Originally Posted by
drainedwife 
if anyone has any ideas as to how i can get more proof, id love to hear...
i just may hire a private eye, if i get more suspicious that things are going on... that will give me the proof and hopefully be worth the money.....
If I may, I would just caution you to look at your motivation for wanting proof. Do you want to prove something to him, or do you want proof for legal reasons? There is a BIG difference here in what it will do to your state of mind and your recovery.
If it is to somehow prove to him that he is lying, you are wasting your time and energy. Because trust me, you can't. He will deny it no matter what and it will make you crazy. If you just want proof to try and make him own up to what he has done, my advice is forget about it and just start living your own life.
If it is for your protection in legal proceedings, I would say go with the PI. It will be worth the money if it will stand up in court, and you won't be the one snooping. You will be able to work on yourself and let the PI work on getting some proof for you. I would imagine it is much more likely to stand up than just your word against his, especially since he is so good at this game.
Just a word from one who has walked this path before you....I drove myself to the brink of insanity trying to 'prove' to my ex that I was right about what I was saying.
It seems like you are in the process of realizing that you are truly powerless over his addiction. Don't let an obsession with getting some sort of proof send you spiraling back to the pit you are starting to climb out of. Life is too short......
(((hugs)))