i too know how u feel when you say u want(need) to spend some time with your son. i do not do anything for my a.s. that i do not want to do. i am not forced to do it, i do it because i want to.there are times that i really enjoy it & there are times when i am so ready to go home. my husband has learned that no matter what he says or thinks i am going to do it. when he is in prison i go to see him for ME, not him.i hope you have a good visit. i hope your son continues to do good. hugs & prayers,