I started Alanon/Naranon at the same time that RAH started in NA. After my 5th step I ended up in AA as well as Alanon. I finished my 12th step in Februrary of this year. RAH has gotten up to the 8th and sputtered out.
My experience has been that the more RAH works his own program and I work mine - the better. He actually has barely scratched the surface of the steps and it is showing in our relationship. He is 2 years sober and a dry drunk/dry addict.