Splendra, I know, and you know, when i think about how nice it would be to be with someone "healthy" and have this "perfect" life. I know that's not the case deep down inside right now. I know i have ALOT of work to do on myself or i will fall in the same trap of a relationship i just got out of. I guess it's because society kinda puts timelines on things, like i should be married but such an age, and kids by such an age. I do realize i put way too much pressure on myself and maybe that's why i wanted things to work so badly with me and J. I often said it was like putting a square peg in a round hole. But i guess i thought over time we had so much laughs and good times that it would all work out and we would gel.
But with that said, it's NOT ok for him to have treated and disrespect me like that. I"m so quick in my head to forgive him that he has a disease and he's sick, and screwed up. But why should i fogive that treatment that he gave me. He's an adult, he knows better, he intentionally went away with his X. There is NO excuse for that what so ever. Gosh, you can see by this my brain is MUSH
i do feel better today but it's always the day after counselor or al anon...doesn't last very long.......