Please consider ourself HUGGED veggie mom.
So you've been in Al-Anon a year...Good for you...and you've been married for 13 years..WELL, in my opinion you still have 12 years of Al-Anon work to do before you really recover from the family disease of alcoholism......that is unless you're alot faster learner than I am....for me the program has to become a way of living life on life's terms....I need the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions to help me live a new way, one incident at a time....I got to Al-Anon one incendent at a time for 45 years; so I firgue I'll be 90 years old before I have UNLEARNED the first 45 years...
MY problem is I WANT instant grafifcation...I WANT the pain to go away....But I soon learned in working with my sponsor that I was pre-programed to marry into a disfunciontal(?) marrage and IF I didn't learn to do things in a different way even if I left my marrage I'd more than likely just go out and find somelse just as sick ( or sicker). My sponsor pointed out to me in no uncertian terms that the "HORNS ON THEIR HEADS JUST FIT THE HOLES IN MINE."
Believe me, I completely understand your anger, disappointment , frustartion, the whole range of feelings your going though...but YOU now have a choice to make while he's in treatment....you can go forward with YOUR recovery.....knowing that He's right where he needs to be whether he likes it or not...
Keep coming back, use this site for venting, telling it like it is, for honest program feed back...so you can hear what youre thinking, see where you'e going... to get to where your H.P. needs you to be.
lOVE AND PRAYERS from one who cares....