You said you were at a speaker meeting last night. If you search around the internet for places that have lead recordings, look for a guy named Wayne B. from California. He talks about the acceptance he found at meetings -- and the guy is hilarious. Might make you feel better.
And, I'm glad you're back, too. There are no cousins in the rooms, only brothers & sisters who may not have met yet.
Peace & Love,
Sugah