Hi...I don't believe we've met which seems to be the case with others on the board these days. I don't post much lately...I mostly read.
Welcome...but sorry for the circumstances that brought you here.
My exAH was the addict in my life. His DOC was/is cocaine which progressed to crack addiction. I had the same issues before he became an "ex". My head wasn't meeting my heart. It took time for even my heart to finally meet somewhere in the middle before I was able to take the steps. I, too, thought about all of the money spent, all the days I wasted sitting home with him while he was high or sitting home waiting for him to come home. I look back and think about how ridiculous I was. But, you know, in the end, what's done is done. Hind sight is 20/20. You can't go back and change the past. At the time, you made your decisions for a good reason and whatever didn't work you've learned from. It's about what you do each day now for you.
As for the child services....she has family....so leave it up to her family to take care of matters, in my humble opinion. Looks like she is doing a good job of getting herself caught anyway.
Take care of you.