cinderellawkids

I was thinking about some issues I still carry in every day life and things revolving around them. As the rosecolored glasses are off its obvious that there are many As all around me at every second, whether active or not.
Ive learned in alanon and other readings and coda meeting that when another person is overly critical, abrupt ect many times its a reflection of their inner feelings about themselves and nothing to do with you, just they are allowing one of your/our traits aggitate them, course they'd be aggitated anyway.
For me I see that in me, as well as still have a difficult time dealing with people this way, some days it seems like the whole world is cruel and harsh and I react with a vengeance, just as mean and snotty or worse.
This is something Im trying to change immensly about myself, for weeks Ill do good, keep the same calm tone and let nothing get to me other days, I internalize it all and explode like a crazy person. Suddenly I am once again having trouble with this. Im sure before there were phrases I learned to keep me calm, I go to my HP, constantly for strength and wisdom, and I know for me in many things Im doing the best I can.

Changing learned behaviors that we've had for 30 years is not an easy thing, it takes daily effort.

Im sure these thoughts, reactions ect many of us deal with and I think an important part of recovery. Let's please share how we have changed our reaction patterns, learned to say nothing at times cause it doesnt real matter, ect.