The thought of ending it all pemanently crosses my mind more often than i car to admit, but I just keep taking one day at a time and try to focus on what I can do instead of giving up
So much BS to deal with makes getting cean and staying that way seem immpossible.
Im trying to work on solutions even though im taking baby steps I am getting better slowly.
My problem is that i find where I am unbearable unless I am feeling numb.
The first course of ACTION IS TO GET OUT. Atleast I know that I just dont know when I will have the resources to ifnd my own place and financially maintain it. I stay out of here as much as possible. That is why I first got the job at the fair. i also think I decided to travel with them to the next show. It isnt far. i would have to take off work, but the $ makes it worth it. i could use to get away from here for a few days.