(((Kodris)))
Welcome to SR!!! Sorry you find yourself here. This is a painful road we travel, but it helps to have others to share, pick their brains etc...as you have been doing.
My 30 year old daughter is my addict. She was a registered nurse, hurt her back at work and spiralled down into addiction where she lost her son, her job, her home, her car and everything that meant anything to her. Does she want to be a junkie!! NO!! But that's where we are.
She was injecting for 1 year before she reached the point where she couldn't hide it anymore. In that time, she was continuing to work at a hospital and pay bills. But that all stopped.
As said before me, addicts are very manipulative, and good at hiding how bad their addiction is...including hiding from themselves the degree it's at. She tells me that she didn't really realize how bad things were. She absolutely thought her son never saw her injecting, but it turns out that he did.
My daughter looked normal for the year I was clueless. She did sleep a lot, and somehow never had enough money for bills, etc. I didn't understand how she couldn't get ahead. In retrospect....I guess there were clues, but I was clueless. I had no experience with drug addicts, and actually thought the drug problem affected other people, not anyone I knew!!
Lots of good advice above....There is a wonderful book about enabling....called...."Co-dependent No More". Most things you would do to help a normal person, actually hurt addicts, so in effect, in ignorance, we can love our addicts to death!!
We all want to save our addicts and believe me...if there was a way...none of us would be here. I would give my life for my daughter, but unfortunately....that would not stop her addiction!!!
Read lots, ask lots...this board is a life saver
NSW