Originally Posted by
drainedwife 
when he started ordering some drugs on the internet and was seeking painkillers through dr.s ending up with oxycontin. eventually he started snorting the oxycontin. last winter/spring i took him to a addiction dr. who put him on suboxone and he stopped the oxycontin. he still taked the suboxone. but then he started with the cok again and has been using ever since with maybe a few weeks in between of not using (maybe). right now maybe he has stopped for a few weeks but im not sure about that either. during the past year hs has told me he has stopped but i would always find evidence to the contrary. also during the past yr. and a half if i approached him with thiings he didnt want to discuss (finding whit powder residue on bathroom counter or cash advances) he would usually get red in the face and start yelling at me and then it would escalte and about 6 times he has grabbed me, or put his hands around my neck, (not choking). this past time was when my daughter was present and starting hitting him to let go of mommy. now, you tell me...is this an addict??? is this someone who can quit on his own??? is this someone i can trust????
i just feel bad because he cant seem to see through his denial at all......
advice??????????????
In my opinion YES he is an addict. NO, this is not someone you can trust.
Can he quit on his own? He is still in denial. Even the best treatment centers have a success rate of around 11%...No, I do not think he can or WILL quit on his own.
My advice is to go through with the permanent RO and divorce perceedings.
don't worry about him and his denial. Whether he can quit or not is HIS problem-he owns that problem, not you. You have no control over whether he quits or not.
You only have control over what you do about yourself-try to focus on the things you can control.