Oh SF, are you secretly seeing MY husband? He's a real catch, but sounds like you already know that. Your story sounds so similar to mine. I finally made the very difficult decision to let my AH go just over a month ago. He lived on the street, in the woods, etc. for several days before his Mom took him in while we tried to find a treatment center that would accept him without money or health insurance. He's been in 6 detox centers, in addition to 2 weeks of rehab since early March. I seperated our finances months ago and am doing the best I can to sustain myself. I went to our county courthouse and met with a Family Law Counselor and have all the paperwork necessary to file for a "No Children w/ Property" divorce w/out lawyers. He's supposedly leaving for a long-term treatment center in Alabama this week. It is a 16 week program and completely free. It is a work study treatment program. Good for him, and this time apart will continue to be good for me. I'm treating myself to a long-overdue vacation with a girlfriend from college in July to Las Vegas. I really don't have the money for a vacation, but I REALLY need one.
Do something for yourself. The right decision will come to you, when the time is right. (((HUGS)))