I've learnt over the years that when I have unrealistic expectations of people who cannot fulfill them, I'm my own worst enemy. When I choose to not look at anotheras actions which continue to tell me beyond a shadow of a doubt that they ar enot the person I want them to be then I am at fault not them.
Your relatives continue to show you over and over, unfalteringly who they are. You continue to walk back into and think there is something you can do or say to change them.. And there isn't plain and simple. By doing that you are always giving away your power to them. You tell them they can treat you badly. You are the only one who can change a little step at a time.
Earthworm