My experience is in being the enabler myself. I was trained to be one by my mom... not intentionally, of course, but just accidentally. I hated the anger and the chaos when she didn't get her way - so I learned to give her what she wanted.
This seems to have kicked in again with other relationships - not always, but certainly in order to keep the peace.
With my children, I enabled because when they were without the things they wanted, they appeared to be in pain. I believed all my life my "job" as a mom was to ease their pain and keep them safe.
It took a while before I was convinced that I was actually increasing their pain by extending their active addiction. I did not think that way all by myself, but had to be surrounded by others who were all talking and acting the same way. I IMMERSED myself in Alanon in order to stop some of the enabling.
I couldn't stop all the way or all at once, but only a little and only over time.
Perhaps you could offer to attend some Alanon meetings with your younger cousin? Five or six, just to get the ball rolling? Whatever will be, will.
(((hugs)))