Sorry, I guess I forgot to ask my question. I got off track telling my little story. Anyway, long story short: Parents divorced when i was four...lived with mom, she was an alcoholic...not abusive, VERY negligent...didn't see dad much after that...when i was eight we went to live with grandparents, not really nice people...mom moved out of state...didn't see her or hear from her for four years until she moved back when i was twelve...still didn't have much contact until i was older, 15-16...at 18 my grandparents kicked me out, i went to live with my mom for the first time in 14 years...she was evicted, had no money, no place to go...i started helping her, got her a place to stay, been giving her money, she calls me every time she has a problem...i'm 25 now...i just want her to be happy and have a comfortable life, and things really have gotten a lot better for her...she hardly drinks at all, has a great job, mostly takes care of her self, but i still feel like i have to help her all the time...even if its not the best thing for me...why can't i stop mothering her and take care of myself? and do i fit in with the "usual" behavior of an adult child of an alchoholic? i mean, i hardly knew her growing up, how could her drinking have effected me that much, other than the fact that it caused her not to be there? just curious and a bit confused...wanted to relate i guess. thanks for "listening".