do you think it would help if you explained the dangers of drug use? maybe she already know how deadly destructive drug addiction can be. i know that you don't want to alarm her, but maybe explain as much as you can, maybe it will better help her to understand why you are suggesting that they not help. maybe you can suggest to your mom to let your son know that he has to go through your dad if he's better able to handle your son's request for money.
i know that you don't want to get involved but is he involving you when hes stressing your 88 yro mother? i know that there is nothing that you can do to change them but he is also threatening you. sounds like your son is trying to control the whole situation, if not with pressure on your parents then its threats against you for helping your parents. maybe i don't have a clue of what i'm talking about too. just hate to see your parents and you have to be manipulated, it has to stop somewhere or he'll only continue what hes doing to you and to your parents. hope i'm not over stepping boundaries here, i care. still praying for all of you