they quite drinking , everything should be fine .. it only it were that easy
We in the beginning think the same thing, in the BB it says that for a man to think that being sober is enough is unthinking. I could not agree more.
I can only speak of my experience, alcohol had me beat down really good before I put myself into detox, I knew if I did not stay sober I was going to die! As a result once I got sober in detox and they told me that if I wanted a chance at long term sobriety the second I got out of detox I needed to go to at least 90 AA meetings in 90 days and get a sponsor I did exactly what they said.
I felt really good my last 2 days in detox, I also felt very safe from alcohol there because I was not in control, the detox folks were. When they released me I was scared to death, there were a ton of 7-11s and stores with booze inbetween detox and my house. I prayed the whole 1 hour drive home just to have God get me home with out stopping!
When I got home only my 20 year old step daughter was home at the time, she grinned from ear to ear and gave me a Big hug and told me she was proud of me. This is the daughter of my wifes first husband that my wife booted out for drinking. She told me "I don't want to lose you Marty!" (She is the only person I let call me Marty!), next the twins (14) got home from school, hugs again, then my wife got home from work and I gave her a big hug and told her I was going to a meeting.
Long story short, I knew I needed to change to stay sober, I have changed drastically, I have learned I am a far happier man when I do not put myself in the position where I think I am the center of the universe. I am far happier when I am doing for others.My wife commented within the first few days I was home that I was a very different man in all the good ways, she also let me know that it would take time before she would regain trust in me and she was honest and said she was not sure things would ever be like they had been before I really started going off the deep end with my drinking.
My wife has supported me in the best way she possibly could, she has been understanding of the time I spend away from the family going to meetings and working the steps. She goes to one open speakers meeting with me every Sunday, she loves them, she loves to hear the ESH shared by alcoholics with years of sobriety, she says that they give her the hope that I can maintain my sobriety and the person I have become, I always remind her I have a long way to go and she lets me know that she is happy with where I am at now.
Guess what? I am happy with where I am at now, but being the good alcoholic that I am, I plan on continuing working and living the steps to where I can continue to progress and have more then I have now.
LGLG hon right now your husband sounds like he is in the same mode I was in at that time, I pray that he continues on in his recovery, losing that self centerdness is crucial for an alcoholics recovery and it sounds as though not only is he going through the right motions, he is going through the right emotions.