What to do what to do
I kicked my AH out 2 months ago. It was a very hard decision on my part. He couldn't or wouldn't stay clean. I tried everything to keep my marriage together. In the beginning he was calling me every 3-5 min. So, I changed my cell #. Since then, there has been very little contact. Normally I just call him on payday for money. I have been through many different emotions over the past 2 months. I have been happy, sad, lonley, content, mad, depressed. It has been like a roller coaster ride. I have tried to find out who I am. I bought a new camera and have been taking classes to use it. I love it! I am been focusing more on me and my son. I finally got out last weekend on a semi-date with an old friend. I had a great time. My finances are finally looking up, all my bills are paid and on time, I even have a little money in savings.
I found out yesterday that AH lost his job. He called me and told me that he hit rock bottom----no job, no car, no wife, no friends, no family, no home. I mean the bottom. He has lived the past 8 days in a crack house with no running water or power. I mean he has never been this bad before. This time he resorted to shooting up, something he always said that he would never do. So, now he claims that he is ready to get clean and move on with his life. He says that he is leaving for rehab the first of next week in another st. He asked if we could talk before he left. So, I went to see him, I took his cousin with me. I knew that I could not go alone. I was totally unprepared for what he looked like. He has lost 50lbs in the past 2 months. He looked like a scared little boy, it broke my heart. Both of us did alot of crying and talking. He asked me not to proceed with the divorce until he comes home from rehab. I told him that I could not promise him anything. All my old feelings came back. Now, I am not sure what I am doing. Is this a codie thing. I feel like such a fool. Any words of wisdom or advice is appreciated.