i can agree with a lot of what you say, sunflower. rule at my house is we'll help our adult daughter if it works towards her recovery AND she asks nicely. it's a fine line, though, sometimes - enabling and helping. so i know why it is a big topic on this board..
but agreed, my family never turned their back on me, and i'll never turn mine on them. as long as everyone is working towards a common and positive goal - there is a great amount of strength and comfort in numbers.
blessings, k