Hi Holy, Welcome to the boards. You can stop you just have not
found the way yet. As Walt Disney said, " The greatest journey
begins with the first step. " You have taken that first step by opening up to the fact there is a problem. Choosing the path
of that step can be difficult. There are different recovery methods
that can walk with you, however, you need to embrace them.
I can only suggest what helped me. I went to the VA and did a detox/program. They helpped me get to a point that I could set up a program for myself. Finding out what I needed required
proffessional people. You can try but, you don't need to fight
this battle unarmed and alone. We are here to help with support
and encouragement. Don w