Yeah, that's a tough one. Especially for an alkie like me that knows everything
Under the Influence pretty much nails the physical aspect of Alcoholism. The stages we go through, and the changes in the body are spot on. And although it says AA is a good program, it doesn't agree with AAs "character flaws".
Pretty much every alcoholic I know shares some traits. "Character defects", if you will.
1. We're perfectionists. Sometimes OCD, but more often, we have un-realistic expectations of ourselves, those around us, and life in general. A lot of us are "driven".
2. We don't fit in. We always feel on the outside, never a part of. Some of us over-compensate by being extroverts, but just as many of us are introverts. Again, to cope with these feelings, we overdo everything. Work, hobbies, mowing the lawn, you name it (see 1.) Always proving ourselves to others, and ourselves.
3. We're sensitive. Maybe not to you or your needs, but we don't take criticism well. We want to be liked, by everyone. If we're not treated "special", we retaliate via outright aggression or passive aggressiveness, or simply withdraw.
Alcohol helps us feel "better than", helps us integrate with society and socially (so we think), and fuels our perfectionist attitudes. It quiets the anxiety, and lifts us when we're depressed.
If we never drank at all, we would still be lonely, angry, depressed, outcasts.
But after running to alcohol and finding relief, the physical aspect that Under the Influence talks about kicks in. Things begin to change, for the worse, but
we don't see it. I swear, it's like waking up one morning and saying "Wow, my life has turned to s**t".
If we can manage to quit drinking (which, when physically dependant is NO easy task), we're still lonely, angry, depressed, outcasts. Only now we're dealing with all of the s**t we created while drinking, and have absolutely no idea how to live a sober, serene life.
The ONLY thing that this alkie has found to work is AA. Not to say other programs don't work, but I tried just about everything.
Hope this helps.