My boyfriend's father died just over two years ago now and he has admitted himself that it is no excuse for the behaviour that he exibits sometimes.
I could go on forever about the possible reasons why this could be happening like the fact that he was a British soldier for 4 years and spent 12 months of that time in Northern Ireland in the early 90's seeing his mates getting blown up.
I tell him that he lived through that for a reason but i'm not sure whether he's taken on the fact that that reason is life and you've only got one shot at it.
Something inside of me has changed just recently, the first step that i took was to simply not respond to him when he got mad, sometimes i would just smile at him and he'd look at me like i was going crazy and then shut up. It worked we haven't had raised voices for weeks now and even though we drank a little yesterday we did have the best time that we have had in a long while. The glimpses that i see of my boyf as he used to be are a lot more frequent now.
The question i think that some of us need to ask ourselves is are they actually worth the wait and are we able to wait for them??
Some may come back and some may not but i think that my baby is on his way back and i have faith that he will return one day and i CAN give him time, time that he has given to me, to heal pain that i have been through myself, not drink but the death of my mother and grandmother. to cut it short now in the time that we have been together (4yrs) 3 people have died 2 of whom were parents(best friends), we have both bought a house and have massive ties around us, me having a sister who is in constant need of the small amount of energy that i have left sometimes. I don't think that we have ever really had the time to get to know one another. He picked me up when i was down i will be here for him until i decide otherwise.