I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I wish I could be of more help ...
I'm thinking of you ... I know how hard it is. At least try to do something good for you tonight - a long shower or bath if nothing else.
And please think about the hardcase suggestion. There's nothing illegal about making kids get their own dinner. Maybe it's not for you, and that's fine, but I swear it works wonders. They think you have to do their bidding cause your birthed em. Show em different.