My issues of codependency carry far beyond my relationships with alcoholics. Take work for instance. I have the same tendencies to become overly sensitive to what other's think. Take girlfriends. I just ended a relationship with a self centered narsisist because she was manipulating and using me.
Leaving the A entirely out of the equation I have problems relating to others. I seek approval, I never feel like I fit. I could leave my husband and I will still have all of those traits. My problems are not the result of his drinking and if I leave I take me with me.
I put all decisions on hold when I began recovery and the day came when I decided not to leave....today. Today I am married one day at a time because...and only because... the good far outwieghs the bad.
Today I am much more mature person...what he does or doesn't do can't send me to the moon anymore. I am responsible for myself, I am clear about I will and will not put up with...kind of a ball buster, if you will. I am happy.
I doubt I would have ever achieved this level of common sense without Al-Anon.
Go for it!
JT