prodigal

And it's sad, but at least the clouds have cleared from the sky. With all the boozing and chaos and insanity that was going on, all I could see was an obnoxious drunk. I hated the drinking so much it made my skin crawl. Now the drinking has ceased entirely. Now I can see the problems w/o the booze interfering.

My AH is incapable or unable to be emotionally intimate on any level. He makes a good friend, he is polite, he doesn't cuss or carry on ... but he is eerily detached. Actually, complacent is a better word. But I now realize he was always that way: never assertive, into his own little world, unable to share his hopes and fears. Okay for a nice acquaintance, but gets a big, fat "F" as a husband. It's sad because he is a very lonely man who has imprisioned himself in his loneliness.

I thank my H.P. for giving me this opportunity to see what is going on here and allowing me to see that this just ain't gonna work. And, most of all, I am relieved. Can you imagine living with a husband for the rest of your life who makes polite chit-chat, sleeps in a separate bedroom without questioning "why," and never touches you - not even a pat on the shoulder? Not me!