Oh yeah, FriendofBill -- yup, it's pride alright. Pride and fear, because if I admitted that I was just as sick as anyone else walking through those doors
I would have to do something about it. I would have to get out of my little fairy-tale world where DH isn't an alcoholic since nobody but me & the kids ever sees him drunk and admit that
even if we were the only ones that saw him he would still be an alcoholic.
And I'm still struggling with denial. I woke up this morning thinking "OMG, what if I'm wrong? He might not be an alcoholic after all. And I've just latched on to something because it makes me feel good and maybe I'm not seeing things clearly???" (Yeah, right. Because a bottle of scotch a night is just what every responsible father downs between dinner and passing out on the floor at 8 pm, right?)
I think this is why we're so isolated, too. Because it's easier to create "enemies" on the outside than to fight the voices in your own head.
[quote]I need to warm up to this sharing thing...It's been my secret for so long I don't even know how to talk about it.[/i]
Hey, Sillygirl (btw, you're not silly, you're here, and that proves you're smaht!) I hear you. I just have a warning: Once you start sharing, it's hard to stop, because it's so relieving. It's literally like you take something out of your head or your heart and put it down and the weight lifts off you.
Off to reading.
Thank you all for the warm welcome. Again.