thank you stormtooth that certainly does ease my mind a bit. so my thinking is what makes me an addict not my addiction. so if i change my thinking i lose the addiction. i like that. and the 12 steps are suggestions not laws that help to change ones way of thinking, but certainly not the only viable method of helping to aid one in that transformation, bet merely one of many possibilities. i am grateful for being sober another day and for the advice.