Hi!
When I was a young child, I was trapped under a heavy object.
At first I cried and then I had to will myself to tolerate the pain.
I asked God to stop my tears and numb my legs until help arrived. That is how I survived. It was no different when I found out my only daughter was using drugs. At first the pain almost killed me. And then to survive, I stopped feeling. I stopped feeling pain but I also stopped feeling joy.
My daughter has stopped using and is on the road to recovery.
I am the most grateful mom on the planet for her efforts.
But as sad as it is, the joy is still in the distant. I am terrify of
feeling the joy again only to have her return to drugs. So I put joy on the shelve. I have slowly watch her become her old self.
I thank God every day. But my heart is still waiting. When the
heart has been broken, it takes time for it to heal. I have cried a
river and it will take time to dry up the riverbed.
Mara