Mazey,
Welcome. You will find understanding and a listening ear here. Your story has similarities to my own. I totally understand the 2 different people because that is my AH. We are now in the process of a dissolution and he has been on his best behavior (for a short while), but it just makes me sad that he can be this person at times. I know however, that without help he will revert back to his old ways.
Keep posting