J - glad to hear from you. So sorry to hear about your sister. J - sounds like you are really learning to live one day at a time. All I can say is keep on keeping on. Take care of your yourself and taking care of your little ones will follow, which it sounds like that is what is happening.
You and your kiddos deserve a happy life. God wants us to be happy - and it appears you are finally realizing AH can't make you happy - that is between you and God.
Take care!