How is everyone in the Secular Connections forum doing this year?
 

Simply because of the general approach we take, the secular connections forum can seem a bit quiet at times. That doesn't mean we aren't checking in and staying sober, though. So...how is everyone doing so far this year?

I am still sober and doing well. Sobriety has really given a lot back to me, especially the gifts of time and potential. My biggest problem is figuring out how to prioritize my interests and allocate time to them. Things that maintain my mental and physical health must take priority, but I have a strong desire to be productive first. However, if I let my physical and mental health slip, the productivity drops, and then my AV starts sneaking back into my thoughts. Still, I'd rather be worrying about how I can be most productive than whether I can make it to work without vomiting.

I hope everyone is doing well!

Hi Jazz!

Things are great here. Just passed 2 1/2 years and yes, I struggle with similar issues in regards to productivity and time allocation. In some ways I still feel like I am making up for lost time, those last years spent drinking when I didn't do much but the barest essentials and drink. I have completed some big projects but I still struggle with balance especially the all/none approach I have towards exercise.

I check in here frequently but haven't posted much, but I love to hear about my buddies and how well they are doing.

I think the most important message I would want to impart to someone who is newly sober is to be willing to be uncomfortable and try anything and to take advantage of the multitude of approaches that SR is wonderful enough to share daily.

Thanks so much for the thread Jazz and Happy New Year!

Great idea for a thread, Jazzfish. At over one year I feel good although I am also having some issues with allocating my time and energy these days. Physically I feel healthy and have good exercise and have been toning up. Mentally I feel well enough but do experience some flatness in life these days - no more alcohol induced highs and lows, which to be honest I miss these days. Work has been stressful of late and I have issues with spending time on family/myself/work. Such is life on life's terms I guess! Onward and upward!

Passed the 5 year mark in December, haven't felt triggered in years! Drinking again is about the farthest thing from my mind, almost as unthinkable as snorting coke or dropping acid, things I haven't done in 35 years. Keeping busy with two jobs and multiple hobbies and feeling great! :)

I pray that I can write your post someday!!!!

Great to hear from you Jazz and awesome to hear all is well!
I'll be three years this summer and am at a point when I forget I'm "sober", I'm like a transdict, it's as if my inner teetotaler has emerged and I didn't even need hormone therapy :)
Tomorrow I will probably tackle my procrastination , so there's still that , still.. Onward ! Upward!

I entered the new year with 2 years of sobriety. Looking to improve my status as a working adult this year.

btw - MesaMan has reached 2 years today.

Congrats to MesaMan , 2 yrs + a lil bit for being a 'mesa man' thanks to albert and time dilation :)

Hello all, and thanks for this thread, Jazzfish. I'm new to Secular Connections but not new to sobriety (>16 months). I've recently been spending a lot of time reading old threads in this section, as I'm disengaging from AA and committing myself to a non-12-step approach.

I feel really good and happy to have found such a wealth of good info and experience regarding AVRT. I have a fledgling daily mindfulness meditation practice going. That, along with daily exercise and journaling my gratitude, form the basis of my "plan" for enjoying life and making the most of it, now that I'm a non-drinker.

I may start my own thread to kind of journal how that is going for me. But I wanted to join in here just to say hello, and thanks to all of your for your past posts, from which I am benefitting greatly. :)

I also entered the year two years sober. I attended an AA meeting (maybe my seventh in two years) because I kind of wanted a two-year chip (if they exist; I got a one year chip). Not only did they not have a chip for me, but I was again kind of turned off by AA. I could use some community, but I just can't hang with the AA perspective. No reason to get into it...

But I'm doing well. Working the MBSR and working with related practices to stay grounded and continue my spiritual nontheistic growth. I'm doing a weekend Shambhala retreat in a couple of weeks, as well. Just feeling more content and grounded than I have since long before getting sober.

Good to hear others are making progress, as well.

I'll have three years in April. Doing well!

About to have jaw surgery Tuesday morning.

Shifting gears from blogging/copywriting to proofreading over the next few months as well.

We have our house up for sale finally. It's not ready, but we're working on that!

Lots of changes for me over the past couple of years, as well as upcoming changes. :)

Good hear too. Soon to be two years sober in Feb.
My sobriety was the necessary foundation for me becoming who I should be. Trying to perform the overhaul while avoiding becoming a wing-nut. LOL!

Now that all the holiday jive is over, I'm reducing the sugar intake (talk about your AV!!) and designing an exercise plan. Instead of going gung-ho and then burning out (previous pattern), I'm striving for effectiveness, reasonability, and sustainability.

Hope everyone is well. I don't often post here, as the secular section moves a little slow. I do read often though.

good to hear from you Jazzfish :)

D

All going well here Jazzfish!! :)

I'm doing just fine. Had a minor fail late last year but otherwise I'm about two years sober now. Wishing the best for all of the secular bunch and happy New Year to you.

Good to see you, jazz!

I'm in a place today that I never dreamed possible a year ago and I owe it all to a single decision I made in December 2014. Of course, that decision was to quit drinking forever but I was only able to make that decision after finding my way to SR and the Secular Forum. I finally heard the message that I didn't have to fix all the crud in my life in order to get sober! I could get sober and THEN a lot of the crud in my life would naturally work itself out! Brilliant! A big thanks to everyone who contributes to this outstanding little corner of SR! :hug:

This year I've been able to reclaim my life in all sorts of ways...both big and small. Sometimes I think it's the little things that make the biggest mental impact. Stuff like going to the dentist regularly, taking car of the car, doing laundry regularly, just doing the basics and taking care of yourself. I neglected SO much when I was drinking, including my health, finances, relationships, etc...

The big changes this year....I quit a job I couldn't stand and I ended a long term relationship with an alcoholic/addict that was bringing me nothing but grief. I took big steps to take car of myself. Something I hadn't done in a very long time and it was really empowering!

Quitting has had a snowball effect in that the very act of CHOOSING to quit drinking has given me the confidence I needed to enact other positive changes in my life. It's given me momentum and a life I honestly had stopped hoping for.

It's good to see everyone checking in! :)

Happy New Year!
Xo

And here's Brynn sounding like one self-empowered self-discovered badass in-charge type person! Awesome!

What you say is so true for me too. I am four and a half years sober, I quit smoking a year and a half ago, and now I am going after my fitness. I got my obstructive sleep apnea diagnosed this summer and it is being treated with great results. Mood is better, energy level is better, diet is better, exercise and motivation are way up, and weight is way down.

I am looking forward to a great year in 2016, and wish all who are searching and those who have found their answer a healthy and peaceful new year.

I'm as busy as a one-armed paper hanger but aside from that things are good.:lmao

10 days in, not enjoying how my emotions are running away with me at times, but I'm learning coping skills, and have realized that I can indeed do this.

Wishing everyone here a happy, bountiful, and sober year ahead.

Wow! Great to wake up and see all these great updates! Thanks everyone!

Happy to have found SR on day 12, this forum in particular is very helpful. Concept of AV very helpful. :c011:

I mean I am on day 12, found this site on day 1. I :thanks like the secular buddhist information.

Hello and welcome kuebiko!

Sounds like you're really kicking butt, Brynn!!! We quit around the same time and I remember you from early days here. Way to go in totally transforming your life for the better! Keep us posted on your upward spiral!!! :c011:

Good to read all the updates. I took a break from here for a spell, but I'm still sober and enjoying life. Best decision I made was to just stop drinking (and never starting again). Take care friends!

(My second post in this thread ~ ~) Joined SR 1/1/16. Day 21 though I've had up to 13 months sober over the past 4 years - I guess the average length of time sober over the past 3 years has been about 5-6 months. Did this alone, tried ZZ but it made me worse, to be honest. (My worst drinking times were 90s and early 2000s - rock bottomsville...)

During this latter time, since about 2007, I've been exercising (running, cycling a lot), done a couple of ultra-marathons as well as trail runs and continued to study 2 university degrees, as well as work and raise my son (11y/o).

Coming here after a more than groan worthy drinking session NYE 2015, I have learned some tools to see me just cast off the burden of alcohol for good. As much as counting days frustrates me because it COULD have been a longer 'day count' to announce, I have to count the good bits of the past few years as well as the bad 'slips' ---- (ugh; slips is an understatement, you probably know how bad even one session is and how many things can be ruined in one night).

The important thing is I am not listening to AV anymore (I've labelled you now, you bastard!) and as well as saying no to the AV I am going to start saying no to other little things - like no to depression, laziness, mess, crowding of my personal space by a lazy BF, for example. (Lift your game darling).

Hardcore aggression and assertiveness against the identified AV, as well as sensible assertiveness toward things I want and against what is holding me back ~ ONWARD.

Thanks to all the group, all you guys, I relate to your posts. Thanks Jazzfish for starting the thread.

This really is a great thread to read! Thank you for posting it Jazz.

I am still going strong. I found the secular connection section when I first got sober. However, it took me a few months to realize it was right for me. It's amazing to read everyone's posts here. Many of you were posting when I first got here. Reading your words has had an amazing effect on me.

Entering this year with just over a year sober. What a year it has been. Quit bar tending and job hopped for awhile. Finally found one that I think is the right fit, for a bit. Back in school taking a few classes and working on getting my degree. Regaining a mental clarity I hadn't even realized I lost. Eating better, quit smoking and exercising regularly.

Getting sober has giving me so much. I agree that it's the little things adding up that makes the huge difference and that the main gift is potential. Along side that is the confidence I've gained. I know I can handle whatever this life throws at me because, well, this was hard.

Blizzard in my area has me couped up for a few days. Watching too much tv and eating too much junk. Still I am happy that it's not drinking and fretting.

Thank all of you who have posted. It's great to read about people doing well today.

jazzfish: I love this post of yours. I also love that you're doing so well. The last sentence of your main paragraph made me chuckle.

God speed!

I've rarely posted on this forum but it might be fitting to use this thread to say thank you to all who have indeed posted here through the years - as this site and especially this forum has been tremendously helpful for me.

5 years sober now. I've got a good job and am 3 courses shy of finishing a degree in Computer Science. I have gotten joint custody and am raising my son. I'm in great shape, exercise a lot, eat healthy and sleep well. I haven't got much of a social life but it does not bother me much. I'm proud of myself. And I feel like I'm finally in control of my own mind. It's not a chaotic madhouse any more. I can now step back and "watch" my own thoughts and not take them too seriously. I can relax and enjoy the moment.

I've started to appreciate this recovery journey as a precious gift. I'm in a place now where I'm so comfortable and so at ease. I doubt that I would ever have gotten there if not for all the bad stuff that started this journey.

Thanks, Artoro, and glad things are doing so well for you. I always love to hear these inspiring posts. I am sitting at home with my daughters watching basketball now. It wasn't much of a day, but I was there to go for a run, make breakfast, clean the house, make dinner, and take them shopping for a fun project tomorrow. That was a lot better than sitting in my chair drinking myself in to oblivion.