Trying this again
 

I wanted to find some online support or any support as far as that goes. I am trying to stop drinking again, been sober since Saturday when I lost another job due to my drinking about 10 beers the night before and missing my work shift AGAIN. I was a no call no show too drunk to go to work and slept it off only to be fired right before Xmas. I am a mother of two and actually was sober while I was pregnant only to start it back up. So tired of the guilt and shame associated with the "good time" . My husband drinks a lot but has stopped for the past few days because I threatened if we didn't change I was leaving. Can't live like this anymore, have stopped before only to start again because been doing it for so long feel that like is too monotonous without it. Any advice to keep on track? Besides knowing I need to be sober for my children which sometimes isn't enough which is not understood by most people. Don't want to feel uncool because trying to get sober. Any thoughts? Thanks.

Welcome to SR.

You don't think sobriety is cool? What is cool about your drinking? You got drunk, missed work, and was fired. And that is just the story you related in today's post.

I think meeting your responsibilities as an adult and as a parent is pretty cool, and sobriety ensures that.

Welcome to SR! Read the stickies and develop a plan to stop before you start. Much cooler to be the sober chick with money and self respect than cleaning up drunken messes. Lots of us have been there so post a lot and read a lot!

Welcome to SR Emily. I'd agree with carl - it's a lot cooler that you are here seeking help than all the uncool things you've put yourself and your family through because of drinking. I did a lot of those things too so I'm not suggesting you are the only one - most of us did.

As far as how to "stay on track" with sobriety, my advice would be to make it a very high prority goal in your life - and plan for it, just like you would with any other goal. There's a whole multitude of ways to go about it - meetings, self-help, sobriety communities like sr, self paced methods like AVRT - the list is long. And you can find info about most of them here. But the bottom line is that you need to do something besides just "not drink" if you want to stay on track.

Hello and welcome.

The "Good time" stopped for me years before I was able to stop drinking.
All I was left with was a bad drinking problem that I no longer had any control over. I was a mess. Pretty uncool.
An alcoholic mess who was only able to make a living in show business where drinking is part of the culture.
I still managed to destroy everything else in my life.

You'll find a lot of support here. So keep reading and posting.

Do it for your kids. Do it for yourself. Do it for whatever it takes Sobriety is it's own reward.
And if your friends think it's uncool not to drink, I would find some new friends.

Best to you and stick around.

People don't give a rats if you drink or not ... they really don't.

If you can stay sober for a while you'll get to realise for yourself .... it won't just be some random stranger telling you this on the internet.

Give it a go !

and a word of advice .... do not underestimate this thing, it can chew you up and spit you out quicker than you can say "WTF?" .... the slow descent downhill can turn into a fall off a cliff with frightening speed and you never see it coming or know when it will happen.

Take action sooner rather than later.

For an addict like myself I have to remember that while I was drinking I was a destructive force to myself and to others. I was generating chaos such as you have recently experienced in losing a job. In such a situation I was faced with the choice of consciously wreaking havoc or not. In this context I faced an ethical decision on how to live.

You stopped while you were pregnant, so you have proven that it is possible for yourself. You were operating under a compelled situation of whether to hurt your child by drinking. That dilemma still exists, and it's a moral one to consider.

I would ask yourself how you can add to your efforts to retain sobriety for the long-term. Does that mean going to meetings (AA or otherwise) for support? Does it mean marriage counseling on how you can work this through with a spouse that drinks, apparently, excessively? How can you respond to the desire to drink when it seems like that is the only thing that matters at the moment? I needed a lot of help and experiences to get to the point now where I have stopped, and it was ugly but didn't have to be as extreme as I led it to be. I don't want to live a life of desperation any longer, and I think you'd gladly give up on that, too.

Being here on SR is tremendous, and I commend you for reaching out with your situation and to ask for advice. You'll find a caring group of people here that have been through much of what you already know and want to leave behind. Avail yourself of all that you can to get through this trouble, it's worth it.

Once upon a time when I was looking for an escape I thought alcohol was my in with the "cool crowd". But once I was in too deep and my health, personal relationships, and finances were suffering they were nowhere to be found. Funny how that works.

Now I've learned how to love myself and take care of myself, it's pretty cool to me. If those in my social circles think that makes me a square....well they are more than welcome to not participate in my happiness.

Welcome to the family. :) I've been sober for nine years now and it is very cool to always remember things and not make a fool of myself. I hope our support can help you get sober for good. :grouphug:

Welcome to SR Emily :)

I thought my life would be over for all intents and purposes when I stopped drinking - but IT TURNS OUT IT WASN;T SO MUCH THE END OF SOMETHIGN AS THE BEGINNING OF SOMETHIGN ELSE PRETTY AWESOME/

I love who I am now and I love my life. I could never syta that as a drinker :)

Looking forward to seeing you around :)

D