Day 3.5 - Proud
 

I made through going out for "drinks" with the team in NYC. I'm staying in the heart of Manhattan right by Times Square. I was asked if I drank alcohol or why I wasn't drinking and I defaulted to a do drink but not now. As I watched everyone I was with have one drink then saunter off to go home I was really happy that I chose that diet coke. I decided to walk around a bit then go back to my hotel and watch some TV. I normally would've gone to a bar by myself which could be fun but if I play the tape until the end this is what it would look like. I'm waking up in a drunk/hungover fog most likely in my clothes from the night before and hopefully in my hotel and hopefully alone. I would be late, I would look sloppy and probably smell from the night before. I would get nothing from the training I had to do early and wouldn't have picked up on an assignment that I was just given. I would be sitting here praying for the day to end so I could go to the airport to drink MORE. I would land drunk and stumble off to the cab stand where I would promptly go home and get a couple more bottles of wine. I would drink until I passed out and smoke cigarette after cigarette (I don't normally smoke) and probably send out or call random people which I won't remember. Wake up Saturday to start the day out drinking all over again until the weekend is gone and Monday arrives as I'm in a panic over not accomplishing anything. Might work from home and continue to drink or go into the office having not showered since Thursday, most likely. I would be doing a half ass job, exhausted, dirty and just waiting to get home for another drink.

It feels good to break the cycle. I know I'm early and there is much more to go through but the withdrawals have ebbed aside from the insomnia, bit of muscle cramping, night sweats and slight headache. I would really like the night sweats to stop as they are really uncomfortable but I have to go through it.


I am happy that I have a space to unload my thoughts. This journey isn't easy and only another alcoholic can understand the importance of making it through drinking situations as I have over the last few days from work.

I understand, and congratulations on making it through. Good job of playing the tape. I'm glad it worked.
Congratulations on 3.5 days, and remember you never have to drink again.

I'm so glad that you're feeling good and doing well. Breaking the routines and habits is a big part of recovery.

Hi
great news that you made it through. I also smoked when I drank (only day 3 here). Smoking makes me feel so awful and drinking does too.
Congratulations
SeaSlug

Well done Janis, you really did play that tape to the end. My tape would have run a very similar way.

The sweats will go I looked on them as getting rid of all the toxins I had filled my body with and strangely quite liked that.

Keep up the good work.

Good going, Janis!

Sounds like a test you passed with flying colors. Well done.

Thank you for reminding me of the "play the tape forward" tip. I've been fighting cravings all night and could use the extra defense!

Great job tonight! Keep it up - it keeps getting better, more real, usually easier, and always worth it.