In a mess again
 

It's been a long time since I've posted and yet again it's because I've fallen off the wagon.

After an 18 year battle I managed to stay sober for 5 years and life was back on track. This year has been horrific though. My sister died suddenly in April and I couldn't cope and started drinking again to numb myself.

I couldn't believe how quickly it escalated again. I am so angry with myself and my family are furious and all the trust that was regained has gone again. This is day 1 for me again and I feel like death. I can't believe how stupid I've been and cannot forgive myself.

Welcome back, and I'm very sorry for the loss of your sister.

Try to step away from the self-blame and focus on a plan to stop drinking and to remain sober. I'm sure you are frustrated and disappointed, but the best thing you can do is to move on from here. :)

Thanks Anna

Appreciate your reply. I guess it's all very raw at the moment and I'm probably not thinking straight. I hate alcohol and what it's done to my life.

I never thought I'd be back in this position.

Glad you’re back, TM75.

Been there, done that.

Somewhere along my journey I realized I wasn't stupid (I was human), and I can forgive myself, (I just wouldn't). I think that realization has made staying sober much easier for me.

Welcome back!
Best of Luck on Your Journey. :ring

As was said above. You did it before, you can do it again. Get after it. You can do this, because you already have.

I'm sorry for your loss TM75, but I'm glad you made it back :)
Welcome back :)

D

Welcome back TM75, I’m glad you’re here. I’m sorry to hear about your sister.

It's so good to see you, TM. Be kind & patient with yourself as you regain your sobriety. We're here to help you get free & begin to build a better life.

Hi TM,
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my sister in June. It's very hard I know :(

Trust can be rebuilt and anger can turn to forgiveness. Put the drink down and keep moving forward. You can do this.

Welcome back! :hug:

So sorry for what brought you here, but so glad you made it back - that takes courage.
Hugs from Derbyshire x

So sorry about your sister. And the slide that brought you here. Your post helped me.

You know what to do. Welcome back.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Hopefully, the memory of your sister will bring you strength in your decision.

You can do it again and you will. Forgiveness will come with time, but know you're definitely not the only one to have been down that path. We're not bad people, we're human.