Daily
 

I start as soon as I get up. Sips of Jager. It takes my edge off. I'll sip during the day also. Last 2 yrs this has been the cycle. Shaking now. I'm 52, work from home alone. Take small amounts of anxiety meds. Drink about 7/8 beers o avg in a full day also, Miller Lite

Not sure how to get the craving out of my head and I can't afford to go to a rehab.

Must stop as I had a liver test that didn't go well last May, elevated numbers.

Worried I can't stop. Nothing today yet but it's calling me for it to get that edge off.

59

My avg for a whole day of Jager is 3 cups [half of a 750ml bottle] is what the conversion says. This is my maintenance to get the anxiety down and it's like maintenance. Ugh

I eat about once a day. Yesterday was a box of Mac/Cheese. I'm just simply not hungry. 6' guy, 190 lbs. Live in Florida in basically a retirement community. Most party pretty good. I'm typing all of this for me, need to get it out and be honest w myself.

I used to be an avid golfer, but don't play anymore, in fact I rarely leave my home very often. Just don't want to. Don't do anything I used to enjoy.

I've been reading in all the threads. Helpful.
I did take a sip this morning to get that edge off. I will try tomorrow. Might need to tell my doctor for assistance.
Thanks

Definitely contact your doc. Sounds like you are in a pretty tough spot. Time for change, no? Make the decision to stop, then you can plan to stop. You gotta get back on the course, Florida has great golf courses.

As mentioned , you might need the help of your Dr right now, otherwise you could end up going around and around in circles, repeating the very thing you want to break free from.

Don't look or plan too far ahead, it will seem impossible right now. Just step back and look at where you are. Take it hour by hour until you are ready to take it day by day.

Exactly where I am at. Tried for a few hours this a.m. I'll see my doctor. I need to stop or I won't be around much longer I'm afraid. And to use that afraid word again, I "am" afraid of not being able to drink. Hard to believe I got to this point but saw it coming.

Thank you so much!

Ss

Hello there. I do think that seeing your doctor is the first course of action. From your posts I think you really are reaching out for help and perhaps the Doc will know where you can get that from. If there is a meeting local to you, AA, where you can meet some other people to help support you that would be good too. Sending you much love and strength.

You are caught in the cycle of physical addiction....getting help to stop is very important. The first week is hard and will require you to really desire to stop.

Have you considered AA?

Hi and welcome 59svj

I was an all day drinker - quitting was hard but the support here helped.
Don't believe the voice that says you can't. We can do amazing things :)

D

I will go to AA, need to stop 1st though.
I went about 10 yrs ago, made it 21 months.

Thank you, well tomorrow is Day 1, I can only hope.
As I said before, felt crappy this morning, not from a hangover, I never got those, but the anxiety issue. I appreciate your words of wisdom. Everyone. I can do this!

Thank you! Yes Doc is Step 1 and or really tomorrow a.m. is Step 1, just to get through it. Scared

You CAN!! Rooting for you.

Hi 59, as you have seen from reading mourned the board this community is full of people just like you who quit for good and made it. They all say it was not easy but was completely worth it.

Visiting your doctor, getting to AA and making a firm commitment for Day 1 all seem like excellent first steps. In time, the rest will come and you will make it if you commit to it. You have nothing to lose and your life to gain. Good luck and keep posting, many people here want to help you.

Thank you so much! Since posting this morning just scared thoughts are all that are racking my brain. The key word was commitment. I've failed as we all have at many things in our lives. I just don't want to fail at this one. I'm hoping for no withdrawls, I hear it can be a long trip at 1st. Mad at myself for getting it this far as it's been a problem for a while, just not while I am awake now. Used to be 5pm, not anymore. Thank you for your support. :)

Hi 59 - My living situation is similar to yours. I'm a snowbird - living in a Florida retirement community about 8-9 months a year and in NY during the hot months. It seems my retirement community parties every day. Porch parties start in the afternoon and continue into the evening and that doesn't even include the functions. I would start drinking after one of my morning activities. I had too much to drink and couldn't do any of the afternoon activities. Eventually, I stopped wanting to do the things I loved (like golf) and stopped doing morning activities. I just stayed on my porch and drank. I became very isolated. I understand exactly what you're saying and feeling. Put the drink down. Start enjoying life. I began to think that I liked drinking more than golf or pickleball or any of formerly favorite activities. Start with a Day One. It will be initially tough, but as the days go by and you start to enjoy the nice weather Florida is beginning to have, you'll be glad you did. I'm rooting for you. Please do it!

Stay close to SR - it's a lifesaver!!!

That is amazing, do you live in my development in St Pete? Wow, you nailed it! I became so much worse since I've been here the last yr. Working at from home [alone] multiplies it. Thank you so much for your post. SR has helped so much already. I will be here. Tomorrow is a new day and I just can't get it off my mind. Scary for sure, but know I'll be a healthier and better person for it. Thank you so much!

:tyou

Hi 59! I agree with the others that you need to see a doctor. After you see them, go straight to an AA meeting. Maybe go to the grocery store afterwards and pick up some healthy foods. Make plans to hit up the golf course. Meet some new people. Just a few suggestions.

You can do this.