18 days,still a lot of anxiety
 

Day 18, WAY better than week one but still a lot of anxiety, have a feeling the beast is biding it's time and is coiled like a snake.

Welcome to the family. :) There's going to be some anxiety until your brain is able to adjust to functioning without alcohol. It takes time to heal.

how are you today Ragsdash ?

Welcome to SR Ragdash :)

D

Thanks for welcoming me, I truly appreciate it and am so glad I found this forum, site. Was fine all day until it got dark. Then for some reason I got really restless, it is Friday, feel like I am missing out. The beast wants to get drunk! Not r todaygoing to happen and I am not changing my mind. Wish it would shut up and leave me alone. I went to the bar today and drank juice, maybe that was a bad idea, just wanted to see some old friends and observe them drinking. Nobody but the bartender knows I quit. Found it boring without drinking. Just by writing the craving is passing. Thanks again.

Warm welcome Rags and well done at the bar.
Stick with it it will get easier.

Re
 

The anxiety will pass. Just stick with it! Congrats on 18 days!

Day 22, new years eve, sober and won't be going out tonight. AVRT is working. However, since I believe in God I wonder if AA and AVRT can in some way be synthesized.

I know a few AVRT members who believe in God. Belief in a higher power doesn't really come into AVRT so its not like believing in God makes the technique any less effective? :)

D

Thanks for the reply. Happy New Year.

Happy New Year, Rags!

27 days sober
 

27 days sober using AVRT. So, this is sobriety? Better than being drunk by far. A lot of boredom to deal with. Turned 58 today, wow that happened fast. Have to get used to life on life's terms instead of hiding in a bottle. Could have done so much more but I just wanted to get high. Onward.

I had a ton of boredom at first, drinking was my go to passtime, ever situation was measured by my ability to drink while doing it. I've been using AVRT also, anxiety and mood swings were off the charts for a good 6 months but I have 331 days sober now and it's getting a lot easier both to fill my time with stuff to do (that I can actually enjoy and do well) and my mind has stabilized for the most part. I never went more than a day without a drink for 23ish years and those days I skipped fit in one hand and happened due to extreme illness only.

Congrats Ragsdash on 27 days!

It gets easier. I know I wonder how much different my life would be if I got sober in my 20's instead of 40's. But I have learned to not dwell on the past and enjoy the present. My past does let me know where I will be if I pick up again. good luck

Happy Birthday! Better to be 58 and sober than 58 and still drinking.

Onward, indeed!

I believe in God, and I don't go to AA - but I just use a synthesis of many schools of thought. I think AA's basic program is good (The 12 Steps) and is a good common sense way for people to live. Some people get a lot out of meeting face to face with other recovering alcoholics. There is a lot about AVRT that resonates with me, too. Same with Buddhism, Christianity, Native American teachings, parts of Muslim teaching, Science, fictional works, and some other out-there New Age stuff. Whatever works, I say. Sober Recovery is great because there's a little something for everyone.

Congrats on nearly a month sober! :) Keep going, it gets better. :)

What bothers me is I knew in my 20's I had a problem, I knew in my 30's and 40's I had a problem but I didn't do anything about it. Tried AA about 10 times but never made any friends there and didn't stop drinking. Wish I had known about AVRT.

Better late than never! I knew I had a problem in my 20s but didn't even think about trying anything until now in my mid 40s. The way I was going I'd probably not have made it to the mid 50s tho, my liver already had enough.

Try not to regret the time taken :)
It is what it is.

I got sober at 40 - I've done more in the last ten years than I did in the 20 before that.

Never too late for Chapter Two.

D

Day 28
 

Day 28. I figure if I went to a treatment center they would have detoxed me, given me some therapy, A A meetings, fed me and tomorrow I'd be going home-back to the mean streets. As it is I read a book, rational recovery, detoxed myself, went through the torture of withdrawal, and here I am-home. I really want to thank people on this website that respond and post. It has helped immensely having somewhere to go to connect with fellow addicts.

Day 28 is fantastic you must be very proud of yourself.

Not proud of myself at all. How can an addict be proud?

Hi Ragsdash. I understand how residual shame may shadow feelings of accomplishment. My low self-esteem predated my drinking years, and alcohol obviously didn't help matters any. But, it's also okay to feel a sense of satisfaction (gratitude) in being sober. You're doing something important here.

Thanks and you are right. I just don't want to get cocky and think that this is easy, we both know it isn't. Day 30 today. In a way it feels like an eternity, so much has happened internally while externally the world is the same. AV is letting me know it's there today-saying for instance " great, You're sober, is that all there is. See, I told you you'd be better off drinking, it was much more fun." Really glad Sr is around to read what others are experiencing.

Not sure if it's proud but when you get a sense of freedom from your addiction it's empowering. I had a bad opioid addiction also which I kicked four years ago, it was a really rough withdrawal with PAWS hard for 18 months and insomnia that plagues me to this day. I don't know what insomnia is like from kicking booze, I already had it through the roof.

Congrats on Day 30 ragsdash :)

D

Thanks.

Awesome that you beat opioid addiction! I don't know what withdrawal from that addiction is like, must be hellish. My daughter is a junkie and I know how sick she gets when she can't get high. Kudos to you!

Day 33, beast is very subtle
 

Day 33, mostly good, still a little off mentally but I do notice I think about what I say to my coworkers more than I used to. Nice not having hangovers, good to be reading again but.....late in the afternoon I found out I have Sunday off and the first thing I thought was "Awesome, I can go to the bar first thing in the morning and drink all day." I have no idea where this thought came from, I mean it came so fast and so suddenly. Of course I won't do it but it's almost frightening that this came out of nowhere with such force.

New to Forum 7 days sober!
 

Good on ya!I can't even go near a bar,smell of booze,sounds,people,music,too powerful for me.