Rainy, I remember you! That number coincidence is crazy— must be a good sign! Congratulations on 38 days — great progress! Keep on, keeping on. I had many starts and stops too, and I know I’ve got to keep vigilant. I’m cheering you on

Great update Tealily! It's always great to hear from you. I'm so happy everything is going so well. The other day I was looking through old photos and videos of my children when they started school.... Taken about 6/7 years ago. I always made sure my children got to school on time, always had everything they needed, I ran the PTA for a number of years.... I was very high functioning.... But behind the scenes, wine was in absolute control. In some of the photos and videos, I'm there.... And it breaks my heart because I'm smiling in every image but my eyes are dead. I know that in every image of those days I was either hungover, tired or counting the moments until I could start to drink. What a waste. I'll be 4 years sober in a couple of months and when I think about how much I owe to this site and to the people here, I could get quite emotional. For the last few years, I've been fully present in every moment of mine and my family's lives. Life isn't perfect.... I think it not being perfect is kind of the point .... But being present in every moment helps to make it as perfect as it can be. When my 14 year old daughter slams her door and tells me she doesn't want to talk to me, I know it's not because of anything I've done wrong. I know it's because she's 14 years old and slamming doors and not wanting to talk to her parents is part of the territory. So now I'm able to provide a steady anchor for her.... Let her know she's loved and supported .... I'm able to be there for each of children without making everything about me. I see that now. Wine took so much from me and in return I idolised wine and projected all my hurt and upset onto other people. Made it their fault. When I look at photos taken during the last few years, my eyes are alive. I look happy. Properly happy. Like I'm enjoying each and every moment. I'm not just functioning anymore. I'm living. It's wonderful. Stay in touch Tealily xxxx