I'll never be able to beat this ! :-(
 

Have drunk for three consecutive days ..( not drinking now) but I just can't see how I'm ever going to beat my problem with alcohol. If anything it's getting worse. I didn't get on with AA as couldn't grasp the Higher Power thing as I don't do God. I have tried counselling, done an Allen Carr seminar and posted on here for nearly four years. Nothing works . I do want to stop but just don't seem able to.
I also have heart palpitations and feel breathless.

I am sorry you are going through such a hard time. It can take a lot of attempts to stay sober for good. Keep reading and posting here. Come up with a plan that works for you.

I am sure you have had days added up before. You can do it again.

Please go to the ER if you need too....that may end up being a good start.

Believe in your user name. Yes, you can do this!
You've not posted much. Have you ever joined a monthly class? It has helped me immensely. There is a lot of information here about recovery methods other than AA. I too think a medical check up might be in order.
Good wishes.

I'm sorry that you are having so much trouble stopping. Believe me when I say that you are not alone.

It seems that you have tried to connect with support systems that might help but ultimately it is going to be you who makes the decision because you have had enough. Have you had enough? I've found posting here of immeasurable value. I'm sober.

Support and understanding are so important so reach out to whatever is available even though you mightn't agree with all, the simple act of talking with others going through the same helps a lot. A real lot.

I know I have had enough, and though it has not been easy I can assure you the benefits of sobriety outweigh the madness and futility of drinking.

Please keep posting and let us know how you are traveling.

I wish you every success Icandothis, a very appropriate username, because you CAN do this!

I would repeat what the others said and recommend posting here every day if necessary (multiple times a day if necessary) and joining a monthly class. I didn't think an Internet forum could help me but it honestly has. Every morning I check in here and every night before I go to sleep. I don't know how it works, I just know that it does. And the support I get on the monthly class thread is priceless. I thought I was a total lost cause and this place has helped me so I know it can help you too. Stay strong and keep posting

I agree with the idea of posting here and reading here, every day. There is so much wisdom, along with understanding and support. You will be able to get through the day sober. For me, changing my daily routine helped a lot to break the habit aspect of drinking.

as couldn't grasp the Higher Power

oh i'd say you have ONE Higher Power right now......alcohol. i'm not being snarky.....but right now you are letting alcohol rule the day, tell you what to do, what not to do, where to go. you have "surrendered" by saying I Can't.

and yet....the sun rises and sets, the seasons change, the earth spins on it's axis, even tho it is insanely heavy it just keeps floating in place. WHATEVER it is that "lets" all that happen, is a by far greater power than what is contained in a can or a bottle. it is greater than any single one of US.

it is not your nature to drink. it is a defective part of the human organism that has this crazy making reaction to alcohol. and it can be overcome. there a lots of lovely folks here on SR who have done just that. in some manner or method.

and you can too. if you could let yourself believe that RECOVERY IS POSSIBLE. that you are not beyond hope.

I quit drinking for good when I finally wanted to be sober more than I wanted to drink. Been sober over 7 yrs now, and it's the best I've ever felt. :)

It took me a lot of trying, but I finally made it. You can too. :) Don't give up!

I know excatly how you feel... 6 months ago i was desperate to stop and had tried everything to stop I was sure I was the one person who was different and would never find away. But the truth is I never really fully fully committed, see us alcoholics we don't like pain and we want instant solutions just like our favourite drink gave us.
The truth is getting sober is hard work and takes commitment without it you could do every conceivable recovery programme and still not quit. I wish you well on your journey

Your higher power doesn't have to be God. The fellowship of AA can be your higher power because whatever you are doing now and on your own obviously isn't working. So check your ego at the door and try different things that AA has to offer such as helping other alcoholics, meditation, sponsorship, meetings, etc. I'm not sure which one of these keeps me sober or if it is a combination of them all, but doing these things has handed me contented sobriety so I keep doing them all. Once you have some sober momentum, it gets easier and easier. ETA: If you absolutely despise the AA approach then try some of the other recovery plans, but you definitely need to have a plan.

Thanks for your advice everyone. It all just seems so hard and overwhelming. I have been drinking heavily for over two decades and being trying to stop for 4 years - look at my SR name ! Am feeling discouraged !

I had to set a date. It was my birthday. I didn't taper off. I might have drank more than usual. I tried to get as sick of it as I could. I kept trying to see all the bad things about drinking and looking forward to stopping. I let my wife know I was stopping so she knew what to expect but I had to quit for me. Maybe others would benefit from it but I had to do it for me so nobody could make me mad enough to drink except me.

Hi Icandothis,

Try not to be discouraged. I too had been drinking for decades and made many attempts at getting sober...only to fail miserably. The difference between now and then is that I have put my sobriety above everything else in my life.

It can seem overwhelming at first. What I did was tell myself every morning, "I'm not going to drink today". I began coming to SR daily and learning how to stay sober, changed my routine and created some tools to keep myself sober.

The toughest time is the withdrawal period (7-10 days for me...everyone is different). During that time I really had to be on my toes. I felt like ****, I was irritable, had headaches, couldn't sleep...but I knew it was a temporary situation...so I didn't give into my AV and I kept adding more days to my sobriety. Eventually was out of the darkness.

Recovery doesn't just happen, I have to work at it every day. The rewards are more than you can imagine.

Get rid of the booze in your home. Commit to your sobriety and use SR for support and to help you devise a recovery plan that will work for you. You will be so grateful that you made the effort!

:tyou

I wondered if I'd beat it for 15 years.

What changed for me was finding the willingness to do whatever it took not to drink again.

I nearly died. That helped me decide I didn't want to go any further down that road, but you have the opportunity of making that decision before you get to that point :)

For me that willingness meant changing my lifestyle, cos my life revolved around drinking. It meant changing most of my social circle cos they were all hard n heavy drinkers too.

It meant changing the way I deal with problems, finding new ways to relax, and learning to sit with feelings I found uncomfortable so that I could learn that they pass, without me trying to regulate my emotions with booze.
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It meant I had to not only find a support network but use it, especially when I needed it, but even when I didn't.

I found my network here and for that first year every post was another nail in the new life I was building.

This might sound hard - it is - but no harder than trying to drink the way we did and still appear normal.

Once I accepted what I was, and what I needed to do to manage the problem, things got a lot easier :)

I really think you can do this Icandothis :)

Spend some time on reading, devising, and putting a recovery plan into action:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

Nothing works...my words. Doing the same stuff does not work. I am not into HP or god much. I go to AA. It is a human connection- people reaching out to support each other. A way for me to get outside of my head.

Yes you can do it. I drank 30 yrs. & am almost 10 yrs. sober, mainly thanks to the encouragement I found here at SR. Please do stay with us. If it was impossible I wouldn't be sitting here typing away, stone cold sober. :)

You can definitely do this, posting here each day helps. What have you tried so far?

I did it without a formal HP. I'm not religious in the least, so it's not a requirement for sobriety.

I didn't think I could do it either ICDT but two months now and it's starting to get easier. I found posting and the support and encouragement here invaluable - I don't think I could have done it without SR.

I also looked at some specific techniques to quit. What helped me most was urge surfing and AVRT - there's info. on here about both methods that you may want to look up I you're not familiar with them.

And keep posting here because it really does help.

You absolutely CAN do this. Keep reading, keep posting. I'm finding reading sobriety blogs very helpful- there's a wealth of info and support here and out in the blogosphere. If other ordinary people can do it, so can you.