Checking in on Day 5
 

Felt like checking in. So after my cruise vacation in which I relapsed and lost my 5.5 months, I did have 9 days and then slipped, and then 5 days and slipped. Here I am back at Day 5. Both of my slips happened on my off days with my husband, so I now have realized I need a plan for Sundays and Mondays when I am off with him. This same thing happened prior to me having the 5.5 months, in which I would stay sober and eventually slip on an off day, but I now finally feel strong enough and with a plan to get through Sunday and Monday without drinking. The other change I have added to my plan is working the 12 steps again with an online workbook. Also, my parents are finally back from their vacation, and they are a huge source of support for my sobriety, and so I now have them back. It's amazing how low I felt 5 days ago, as I felt I wasn't going to make it back and the despair was setting in. Now with 5 days and a plan I feel hope again in my life and optimistic that I can do this again. What an emotional rollercoaster I have been on during the past month!

Congrats on 5 days!

I think one thing is to drop the word, "slip." It wasn't a slip. A slip is accidental. Drinking is a voluntary event. You wanted to drink, so you did. Your hand, your mouth.

I also think since you live with a drinker it might help you to set some temporary boundaries around his drinking. What that looks like is up to you. Leave the room, leave the house, do something to stop that fear-of-missing-out thing. Make a list of some go-to activities and keep it in your wallet.

If you can look at it as his illness, not as a party, that would probably help.

Glad you're back! It took me relapsing many times to figure out a solid plan that keeps me from taking that 1 drink.

Congrats on Day 5...keep working your plan!!!

I was defining a slip as a 1 day relapse, and a relapse as lasting longer than 1 day. Nothing about slip was I defining as involuntary.

I do agree that I need those temporary boundaries, and I have already told him I will leave the situation under certain circumstances. And it is true to view his drinking as part of his disease and not some fun party.

You can do it freedom. sounds like your doing all the right things. Just don't give up. You will make it😀

Thank you. My plan is to take this one hour at a time of not drinking. I don't know if I will ever drink again, but I will try my best to stay sober in the next hour.

It just sounds like giving yourself a break because you drank for one day.

Drinking is drinking. One day leads to the next day. Relapse isn't a word I really would use either. It's re-drinking. It is a well-thought out decision to pick up alcohol and put it in your body. Using a word like relapse sounds like it just happened and there was no chance for it to have gone the other way when in fact it was a decision. Even worse, it was a series of decisions. Many many chances to have turned away.

Your vacation drinking has now become regular drinking "just because." Very slippery slope here.

I do admit that saying, "I slipped," sounds a bit better than saying, "I relapsed." 😀
So you are probably right, drinking one day is just as serious as drinking more than one day. And I am very vulnerable right now. My plan is to just stay sober for the next hour. Anything beyond that I really don't know.

Keep yourself busy Freedom. Always helps me. If you think you're going to cave, post here!

Nice work on day 5

My family's boating vacation is in a couple months, and the motivation to look good in my bathing suit is a huge motivation right now not to drink. That is plenty of time to lose the 7 pounds I want to. If I started drinking again, I will gain weight and feel so miserable on that trip.

Congrats on 5 days.

I think you need to think wider than that.

There are some great ideas on what a plan might look like here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

Plans should be for everyday IMO - the bad days, the indifferent days and the good ones too.

D

Thank you all for your feedback and suggestions. My husband came home from work and went and bought some beer, and I feel a lot stronger this time around. I think I realize that there are too many positives and benefits to staying sober that I don't want to give up.