New guy, here's my story
 

Hi all, thanks for having me, little bit about myself, I'm a boat mechanic, married 13 years, 10 year old daughter and 8 year old son, my wife is not a drinker, I've been a drinker for 20 plus years, never drink during the week but every weekend I do, especially in the summer, we have a lake house that we go to and there's always beers on the boat or at the cabin, most nights there's 10 to 20 neighbors in my back yard all having a good time, I regularly stay up till 4 or 5 am and get up a 8 or 9, I'm not one to lay around, I still get up and get things done, but do so in a bad mood usually, always feel guilty by Sunday and tell myself I'll stop but by Friday I have myself talked into doing it all over again...

My son got into snowboarding last year and we went maybe 4 or 5 times only because it's a 2 hour drive one way and I don't feel like doing that hung over, well the hill opened on dec 17th this year and we were planning on going, went to a friends place for a few was supposed to be only a few, as usual my off button didn't work again that night and I don't even remember going home, I was so mad at myself, still drug my ass out of bed and went but felt like crap all day, I made a decision to stop that day, when we got to the hill I decided to buy a season pass for us even though I couldn't afford it at the time, put it on my credit card for $500 for the both of us as part of my plan to stop drinking and we have been going every weekend since then, I'm on day 48 right now, in the last 20 years 5 days is the longest I've gone, I've lost 22 pounds and feel the best I've felt in years, I'm not looking forward to summer, even tho I love the cabin and boating it will be hard, I just need to try and teach myself new things I guess, thanks for reading.

Welcome.

Maybe this summer, different plans. Ones that don't included the drinking-centric weekends. Next year, if still sober, you are more likely to manage the lake house.

I've thought of that, I'm not going to rob my kids of their summer tho, not fair to them, they are use to going there every weekend since they were born and it's a fun place to be for them, I know I can do it I just know it won't be easy, All my friends are supportive of my decision so that is helping, I will just change the type of stuff we do there, when I was a kid I was a very avid water skier and I plan to get back into that, there was lots of days last year that the kids asked to go tubing or wakeboarding and I said no because I had too much already or would rather sit and drink, so stupid now that I can see it with a clear head, everyday it gets clearer why I can never drink again, all that alcohol money will be turned into boat gas to have fun with and not pissed away.

I think you're making good decisions that will support your recovery.

Congratulations on your decision!

That's a cool story. Nice work on 48 days! Great for you and your kids. Sounds like you have great resolve to keep on going. Just make a good solid, sensible plan for summer and you will be just fine.

48 days is amazing!

Inspirational! Thank you for sharing.

you'll be amazed how much fun and how enjoyable a weekend at the cabin with the kids is while sober.

who's cabin?

You are making a very good decision, and an honorable one for your kids. As others have mentioned, you might want to start game planning now on how you will navigate your summer getaways. I don't see staying up until 4AM with 30 of your closest friends being conducive to your sobriety. I'm sure they will understand, and you will wake up ready to tackle the day, instead of feeling like crap.

That's what I'm looking forward to, actually spending more quality time with them, it's my cabin, I bought it 17 years ago when I was 21, the level was really low at that time and people were practically giving them away, paid $15,000 for it and the water came back 2 years later, my wife's parents cabin was next door and that's how I met her, starting dating almost immediately after I met her, my parents cabin was on the other side of the lake at that time, both my wife and I grew up going to that lake every weekend and I'm so thankful that we can do the same for our kids, having a place like that so young I think might have contributed to my drinking, it's just what we did, sit around the fire with a drink in hand, I don't regret it at all because who knows where I'd be in life if I wouldn't have bought it but it's time to grow up and change my ways, my parents sold their cabin two years ago and now have a R/V parked in my yard, so there's us, my parents and her parents all there, it's our way of life, not going really isn't a option, just need to change my habits, out of all of them I'm the only really heavy drinker, and I may lose some friends but I guess I'll find out who the real ones are, so far the support from my friends and family has been incredible.

I agree 100% not the best idea, my place will defiantly not be the party spot anymore, I've been slowly dealing with being there sober now, spent 2 weekends there since Xmas, kids wanted a fire to cook hotdogs so we did that but it felt so weird to stand there without a beer in my hand, but I did it, the snowboard hill we go to is only 1/2 hour from the cabin so it's closer to go there than back home if we do both sat and sun at the hill, I went over to a friends the one night two weeks ago when we were there and everyone was drinking, I went away from that thinking holy Fak is that what I looked like all the time, went home to bed at midnight feeling good with money in my pocket, sure was a good day and to wake up early and go snowboarding without a hangover was awesome too, that was probably one of my best days since I quit and ironically is was spent with a bunch of people that were plastered, it just made me want to keep going as a sober person.

And thanks for all the comments, I just found this site a few days ago and wasn't sure if I should post but it's nice to have a place to come and talk so thankyou.

That's awesome Sportdeck! Welcome.

Another thing to note is all the things I can afford to do now, I'm in Canada and it's expensive to drink here, 24 beer is $50, it can add up quick over a weekend, tonight I'm taking my wife out to dinner and then to a movie at the VIP theatre, something that I was way to "cheap" to do before, because that money was spoken for, normally on a Friday my first thought was where's the party and where are we drinking tonight, those thoughts are gone already, already got our snowboard gear ready for the morning and getting ready to head to dinner, sure feels good to be in control of my life again.

That's a great attitude to have, Sportdeck. I hope you enjoy your night out.

Good to have you with us, Sportdeck. I'm glad you've made the big decision to change your life. Congrats on your 48 sober days. I love how positive you sound.

I drank almost 30 yrs. It had once been so much fun - but it turned into a nightmare of dependence & chaos. I, too, would have the intention of just having a few - but willpower never worked once for me. Then I started drinking to 'cure' my hangovers. This led to every day drinking in the end - with anxiety and misery through the roof. I'm so glad we don't live that way any more.

So you are a boat mechanic in Canada....what do you do in the winter? Just curious.

Spending more time doing things that matter with your kids is a great way to see the value of you sobriety like you I know regret all that time I pissed away but it makes me more determined to do better now.

That's when I do all the insurance jobs, lots of drunk people hit docks while boating and keep me employed, lol, sometimes you have to think that's the only way it would happen, I've spent the last few months doing that, mostly removing and replacing damaged pontoons, and just this week I started PDI's on our 2017 stuff that's coming in, I eat sleep and breath boats, so it's a good career for me, got the boat show coming up soon so I'll be busy getting boats rigged for that too.