Birthday anxiety ....
 

My birthday is Sunday and I'm having alot of anxiety about it! I'm only going to be 20 days clean from opiates and yeah I feel better then I have in the last 17 years and have no intention go back to that drug life again. I keep going back to it and I keep losing more and more I have nothing left to lose. I'm really done this time, but my birthday scares me I haven't had a sober birthday in 17 years. What do I do so I don't relapse, mind you I have NOBODY, but my fiance I've lost my kids and family during active addiction I hurt them so bad with my actions they have disowned me and told me they couldn't watch me kill myself with drugs. I have no friends all my "friends" were just drug buddies, so I've isolated myself for the last 18 days from them, for my sobriety. Any advice to get through my birthday sober? I appreciate it greatly.

hi fairy no advice just welcome

commit to not using ever again, under any circumstances, PERIOD.

your AV is using your BD as a back door option. don't allow it. have a nice dinner, watch a movie, and snuggle down early for the night. we don't have to DO anything on our birthdays....once we get past about 12, the whole "party" thing gets a little silly.

I suggest a really nice birthday cake to begin with. And ice cream. Is there something that gives you joy? Do it. And rejoice in the fact that you are sober. That is amazing!!

I would buy Myself the nice BD gift I could afford

An addict can come up with any excuse to use..just because it is your birthday that is no excuse.

In 2013 I was sober for 4 months and during those 4 months was my 50th birthday party. Many of my drinking friends couldn't understand why I refused to have a drink to toast my 50th birthday.

Congrats on your early sobriety, well done. As far as advice, I really don't have any, but I would think what I've captured above might help.

First, know that nothing bad has to happen, and so nothing bad is going to happen.

Honor the day of your birth by doing something nice for yourself. Anything at all, it doesn't have to cost money.

Appreciate the quiet and the freedom and the opportunity to focus solely on you. It is YOUR day after all.

Maybe make a cake, have some ice cream and just enjoy having a sober birthday.

Some of my best birthdays have been sober ones - I wasn't used to it at first but now I wouldn't have it any other way :)

Recovery wise, Sunday doesn't have to be any different to any of the other 20 odd days you'll have by then - you can do this FairyEyes :)

D

I'd only had one out of30 prior to this year and that was a long time ago too- got sent down on my 22nd birthday for drunken related brawling - the sober one this time sure as hell beat the last one.

Don't sweat it too much tho it's just another day - there's no day or no reason in this world that you have to use - none/ nothing / zero / zilch - whatever you want to call it they all equate to the same.

You're doing great - try to relax - get outdoors (weather permitting - unless you like building snowmen - location dependent) - go for a walk and just appreciate what there is around you - see it as the birth of the new and free you.

Oh and definitely cake and ice cream - that's a must !!

I guess it just gets to me, because my family hasnt acknowledged me in years on my birthday and yes I know it was my fault because my love for drugs sadly always came before everyone else. Now as I'm sober I'm realizing all the pain I've caused and all the selfish stuff I had done. Every birthday I've always wondered if they think about me at all? I've always been able to numb that pain, but this year is different I can't numb that pain.

The best gift is peace... I hope you have peace ✌️ I'm not much for cake... how about creme brûlée?

Happy Birthday fairyeyes -:) Wishing you peace & strength on your special day. :grouphug:

Hope you're having a good day Fairyeyes - happy birthday

Thank you so much for all the wishes, kind words, strength, and encouragement. I MADE IT! 3 WEEKS CLEAN TODAY :)!!

I had a really good birthday, I don't remember the last time it was so good. I stayed in my pajamas all day, ordered Chinese, and my fiance, his son, and I played mtg all day. (Sorry that's my inner dork side lol) My oldest son who is 16 came to visit and brought me cookies (melted my heart) He said he tried getting the other boys, but there gma said no they couldn't come :( All in all it was a great day and best of all I was sober!

Happy Birthday, fairyeyes :a122:

And congratulations on 3 weeks :c011:

That is the best gift!!!!!

Happy birthday fairy eyes and congratulations!

Congratulations for making it through sober! There's no reason a birthday or any other day should be any different if you have truly committed yourself to sobriety. If anything, birthdays can be used as a celebration of sobriety. Sounds like you had a lovely day!

Awesome job on 3 weeks sober & belated happy birthday