Indulge me
 

Haven't posted in quite a while. So, life is still life even in sobriety. There have been some challenges recently. Both my computers "updated" and wiped em out. Got em back from being repaired and it was like having 2 brand new computers (meaning all my real estate files and important pictures were gone), I got extremely sick for about a week which is more frustrating than anything, and my wife totaled her car but she did not get hurt. Hit a huge buck (their in rut now). It was not insured for full coverage...total loss.

I mention those things to possibly provide perspective. They are not very pleasant things to deal with, they would have been much more unpleasant had I still been drinking. We will get through it, and I will do it hangover free. Other areas of life are actually pretty good, I'm still on my health kick, I'm enjoying the real estate profession, I see good things coming from it.

Lastly, and most importantly for this forum, I am coming up on about a year of sobriety, I have no intentions of returning to drinking. I do not count days and never have, I approached it as a wholesale lifestyle change. I'm not going to try and fix what isn't broken, I'm going to continue doing what I'm doing in that regard. I know myself, I'm either a drinker or not...there is no in-between. I have no regrets, but it required some changes in my life. I am even less social than I was before, but I don't care. I busy myself with other things. I still read this site daily although contribute much less. I am going to try and contribute more now (I was involved with some websites and a radio show for a few months regarding the elections).

Just an FYI for those who are new or struggling. I sleep like a baby, I eat well, my head is clear, my skin and face are not blotchy, I have not had the shakes, "bathroom issues", rapid heart rate, night sweats, feeling of impending doom, a panic attack, guilt or shame from my behavior in months and months. What changed? I stopped putting poison in my body on a regular basis.
Lastly, was it easy? nope. But I believe it is a lot easier than being an alcoholic, and I'm being serious.

Congrats on your upcoming year Jeff - you've come a long way :)
Stay on your toes tho - the beast likes to play possum.

D

really great post, Jeff........so good to "see" you!

Thanks for the post! Yes..... Through all the trials now in life, doing this sober is much easier than it used to be drinking. My best wishes to you, as you continue on your journey.

Thanks for your post!!

Nice job Jeff. You handled a bunch of challenges in a real positive way. Job well done my friend

You're inspirational Jeff. Sorry for all you and your wife have gone through but thank you for the perspective, which we all can do with when things get tough!

Wonderful post, Jeff. I m so very, very pleased for you.

So happy that your wife was not hurt in the accident.

Great post, Jeff!

I think you hit on something really important. None of this is easy. But it's so much harder to be an alcoholic.

Keep up the great work!

Isn't that the truth, somewhere along the way we start deluding ourselves that a few + drinks will help us cope with the tough and unpleasant things in our lives but in reality it makes it harder long term . So much harder.

Thanks Thomas11, ...that was a really nice post and congratulations on one year.

Good to hear from you, Jeff!

Thanks for the inspiration!!! well done

Congrats Jeff. I'm glad your wife is ok. It's common to hit deer and elk in my neck of the woods too. Very scary.

Great post, Jeff!!

Your last part about this being easier than being an active alcoholic makes me think of my first date with my boyfriend in July .... he was about 30 days sober. He remembers that when I shared with him the nutshell of my life (we dated in high school and he randomly asked me to lunch this summer, long story there) and that I was going on five months sober, I told him "there is nothing that isn't better sober." He says now "I didn't quite believe you, but I wanted to know more." He's convinced now. And I can say that applies to both of us, and while SO many of the promises of AA have and are true for each of us, and together - we have dealt with and are dealing with tough stuff, too. His daughter's suicide attempt in Sep, repairing a major rift (of five years and enormous family trauma) between my brother and me, custody and co-parenting for him and his ex-wife, my money "rebuilding" ..... all kinds of little and big stuff. I simply could not handle any of it if I was drinking- and my choice to be sober brings the gift of life, with all it entails.

Love hearing your story!

Great post Jeff! Congratulations on your upcoming year!

Good job on your upcoming year Jeff! Do you plan on a little celebration for yourself? Or just carry on as usual?
Dee's right- don't forget to stay vigilant to protect your sobriety.
Sounds like you're doing awesome :You_Rock_

Congratulations on your upcoming year! Great job :)

Awesome, Jeff, seriously awesome. Keep truckin

Congrats on upcoming anniversary! One year is fantastic! :c011:

Fantastic post Jeff, it is so inspiring and I really love seeing the positive changes in your life and attitude you have made. I am so happy for you and really glad you are reaping the benefits of sobriety.

Sorry about the car and the computers, two things you definitely not need but you can and will get through this.

I'll indulge you friend...

Happy to see you and hear that you are well in your sobriety!

It's always nice to see you.

Really well done, Jeff.

I agree that caution is still in order. That "year" soberversary can play tricks.

You've come a long way! Life is indeed so much better on the sober side. You sound really good.

Well done, Jeff. I think this is really a key insight -- ruling out that fantasy "in-between" zone, that doesn't really exist for most of us.

Fantastic Jeff!! :You_Rock_

double post.

Thank you everyone. It makes me feel good that most of you long timers addressed me as Jeff, because its my real name. It makes me feel like I belong here. Little things....

We are happy to have you here Jeff. Your story is of particular interest to me because I think we share some common traits- outside of loving weightlifting!- that make this struggle difficult, i.e.. being stubborn, not listening to good advice, getting too caught up in our own heads, just to list a few. Watching you work through that has been inspiring and gives me hope. One year is fantastic, you should feel so great about your progress.
While this is is celebratory thread and I don't want to take away from that, I have to add the following. Some of your traits that serve you very well in some areas of life (real state, work in general for example) can come to haunt you in sobriety, such as being over confident. To be clear, you don't seem to be putting that out there right now, with this post, but I want to give you a friendly reminder to watch out for that as you continue in your journey. I don't need to tell you this, do I? You have seen where that has taken you in the past.
In closing, you DID this man, you did it. Feel good about yourself and your accomplishment. Keep up the great work.

ETA: I just re-read my post as I always do to check for errors, and I saw that it gave off a bit of a negative connotation. That was in no way my intention. Please remember that a forum lacks many things that "warm up" words, such as facial expressions, body language and tone of voice. My post was heart felt and intended to be words of support and true praise for you Jeff. :)

Congrats on your sobriety!

I had to learn those lessons the hard way, too! Back-up the computer files and always keep full insurance.....

Glad your wife is okay!