Need some support
 

Hi everyone. I am just looking for some support and words of encouragement/advice. I drank myself into a complete mess yesterday/last night. Something was bothering me very deeply and I drank to make it go away. Ended up making it 100x worse and I acted like a maniac to my bf. I feel so alone and ashamed and scared. I left work this morning because the anxiety was so overwhelming and have cried most of the day. Afraid I won't be forgiven this time. I know the answer is to stop drinking and these things wont happen, but right now I just need to feel like I'm not alone and things will be okay.

Nice to meet you hope,
You are not alone here. I have been where you are many times. I am new to sobriety but all aspects of my life are so much better without drinking. Yours will be to. You just have to start with day one. There are so many helpful people here who are just like us. Hang in there😀

glad you found us!

You aren't alone now!!

Thank you.

You;re definitely not alone HopePeace. I hope things will be OK. Best Wishes :)

D

I'm on day four today. Every time I drink to make something better it deteriorates said situation, in fact every time I drink is increasingly worse. I've been, "was", drinking to deal with my emotions for years now and all it has done has torn my life apart, it's selfish. Because it doesn't actually fix the situation it's just a mask to the pain and a way to avoid dealing with it constructively. Ironically, had I not drank a lot of the problems I was drinking to deal with would of never even happened. If I Could go back now I would, but you can only move forward from here and the only way for me to do that is sober. I been at the bottom of being broken up with, I've lost my wife over it. I can tell you those things that seemed really important and painful at the time do actually in retrospect go away. Like completely, once you move on. Trust me it's not worth it. Stay strong! there is a light at the end of the tunnel here

Thank you for the responses. It makes me feel less alone as I don't have many people I can talk to about this without them being angry at me too.

I drank yesterday too and boy oh boy did it just make everything worse. I have loads of anxiety today now as well. Hang in there. You are not alone.

Thanks letsdance. I hope you feel better soon too. Can I ask if you had an argument with any loved ones?

Welcome Hope! You have lots of people on here who understand. I know it is hard right now, ur the best thing you can do is stay sober. Do you have any other supports in place besides SR?

Thank you Delilah. I was going to go to a meeting today but I chickened out. So no. My family will support me in not drinking and SR does help me but I have never stuck with it.

Take it one day at a time and things will start looking up. :)

Then it time to accept that you can't drink and time to commit to quitting. You get out of recovery what you put into it. So stick with it and reap the rewards.

And if SR helps, post daily. Join the August newcomers class.

Bet there is another meeting you can go to instead. I'd recommend checking that option out. Seems like you haven't really accepted that alcohol doesn't SOLVE problems. It CAUSES problems, but in a delay switch - just like a time bomb. The way to solve problems (and not add to them) is by learning how to deal with life on life's terms, calmly and rationally. This comes with recovery.

Have you made a plan?
If not, that would be a good place to start.
If you have, then think about the things that you were most resistant to adding because you really, really didn't like that idea, and challenge yourself. I say this because often the ideas that will work are the ones our AVs fight the hardest. If your AV had a panic-attack at an idea, it'll likely be a winner.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html

You're not alone, there are many here on SR in your corner HopePeace!! :grouphug:

cant say how many mornings i woke up in agony over the actions and words from me while drunk the day/night before. the fear of the repercussions was horrendous.
but i still didnt stop.
until the morning after my last blackout drunk. my(by then ex) fiance told me some of what i had done and said then tossed me to the curb.
that was when i decided to get help or kill myself. i joined AA, worked the program, and became free from both alcohol and fear of past actions.

walking into my 1st meeting required more courage than i ever needed before. fear of the unknown was quite high- i had no idea what life sober would be like.
very glad i got the courage to walk in there and start working the program.

I was freshly out of rehab when I went into a huge meeting and raised my hand when they asked if anyone wanted to drink and I blubbered on and on through tears and snot how real life was too hard and how much I wanted to go back to rehab.

I was engulfed by the women there. They held my hand, whispered support and when I went home I had a list of 15 phone numbers.

Don't feel scared of the rooms. Remember the newcomer is very very important.