Lost everything
 

Ended up drinking yesterday, girlfriend caught me and moved out.. Lost apartment because her grandparents were renting it to us. Moved in with my father.. He's found me an agnostic sponsor in a.a so I'm going to speak with him tomorrow... Girlfriend says she's not done with me but says this is my last chance to get it right.. She moved back in with her mother..

Sounds to me like you still have a lot actually....a supportive father, a girlfriend who still is giving you a chance to make it right...a new potential sponsor...a network of support here...

Do you think you can now accept your addition for what it is?

Volshen, I'm sorry you're hurting.

Based on what you posted above, I think it would help you to take a step back and do some soul-searching.


If you choose sobriety and recovery because you believe it'll help you win your girlfriend back, you're sabotaging yourself.

Choose sobriety and recovery because you want a better life, one with self-respect and an existence that is forged out of a desire to be governed by your own will and not what's found in a bottle.

Best wishes to you in your work with the sponsor. Choose sobriety and recovery for a better life.

If you stay sober all (may) return.
Then the work of staying sober.
You can do it (if) willing??

MB

I'm sorry you're going through this now, but you have every reason to get back on track and recover. You can do this!

get sober for YOU!

Amazing responses. I will simply add that when I thought things had gotten really bad they could be worse. Gratitude for what I have and don't have gives me some perspective at times.

Volshen, I had to have bad things happen in order to get serious. My world was upside down too. I was so tired of having my life controlled by alcohol - I wanted desperately to be free. Maybe it's your time. We're with you.

I guess I haven't lost everything but it feels like I have.. Without her here I feel lost and it didn't feel good to empty out our apartment... That's been our home for 2 years.. Don't like the embarrassment either.. But I am fortunate she is still talking to me.. I still have my drivers license.. Just in a bad mindset right now.. Sorry for the dramatic title..

Don't be sorry for saying how you honestly feel. Most of us can relate. I hope you can get some sleep tonight.

Thank you for the responses .. I am going to try to sleep I'll be back on here tomorrow... Still feeling sick ... Tiring to even think.. I'll check in tomorrow hopefully with a clearer head...

Tomorrow's a new day Volshen. Get some rest, your perspective may change in the morning.

We're here for you. :)

Hi Volshen
I second what others mentioned chiefly that you haven't lost everything yet.
You are experiencing the embarrassing, lonely and overall negative effects of your choice to drink again. I speak from recent experience.
I'm glad for the support you have!
Until two weeks ago I felt superhuman with respect to quitting drinking but then I drank again. My wife is being supportive thank God and I didn't burn bridges but my self condemnation is at a high.
What I have lost is perhaps also a gain. Yes, I am embarrassed, humiliated, depressed that I knowingly made an unwise decision but it is hopefully a deeper lesson learned. I hope this is the case for you as well.
This path seems to involve bumps and bruises and unknown terrain for some of us but we are here and we are trying. It will bear fruit.
Get back on the horse and ride on! I'll be trotting next to you :)
Best wishes.
Jonathan

I'm sorry you are having a rough time right now, but sometimes it is exactly the situations that almost break us that are the reason we finally truly seek out a way of creating a strong, solid, lasting recovery.

Be thankful that you did not end up sleeping on a bench somewhere because you became homeless. Lean on your support system and make sure that you are NEVER to proud to ask for help, guidance, and/or support. Things can go back up and get you to a place that was even better then before, as long as you put in the work!

Hang in there!

Sometimes it takes that feeling of "all is lost" to finally get us sober. Hang in there!

Very, very, very true. I thought I lost everything too. And I did lose ALOT. But I have my beautiful home, my two awesome kids, wonderful parents, family. I have my health, my dog, my faith. Right now I am blindly putting one foot in front of the other and trusting God that my future is bright - and it will NOT include alcohol.

I have ALWAYS been very stubborn, hard headed, independent, successful. I do and accomplish what I set out to do. Alcohol has been a different story. It has taken ALOT for me to get through my thick head that the one thing I cannot accomplish or do is drink in moderation. That mindset of thinking that I can has cost me ALOT.

AMEN to this post. Probably lots of us relate.
Something "confounding" about alcohol's grip so best to avoid challenging it.

Lost everything

Not everything, not yet. Until you lose the desire to drink there's plenty more to lose.

Volshen, this sounds more like a wake up call to me. Your girlfriend hasn't said its over but, she probably needs a break.

I agree with the other posters though, you need to get sober for yourself or, it's just a waste of time. I only wish I had figured that point out a long time ago. Sounds like you still can.

the morning after my last drunk my( by then ex) fiancé told me some of what I did and said while I was inna blackout then said," GET THE **** OUT!"
to which I didn't argue. packed some stuff and left.
the actions during my last drunk, which I don't remember crap from that day,afternoon,evening, are exactly what had to happen for me to get sober. it led me to a life free of alcohol and pretty friggin awesome.
heck, I have a life and im not just existing!