Social Anxiety and Alcoholism
 

So I'm 37 and have been an alcoholic for a long time, possibly related to my shyness, being an introvert, or depression. I grew out the social akwardness a bit somewhat between the ages of 16-26 and then maintained a self-employed job. Now I am trying to move my way up in the corporate world and it is near impossible with my inability to have conversations with any superiors or people I feel intimidated by.


So I finally got to a doctor today and to my surprise he quickly prescribed me with xanax to use 1-2 times a week as well as an anti-depressant that will take 2-3 weeks to see much affect. I'm hoping the medication can take the place of the booze but I don't have a really good plan. I didn't take the xanax tonight and know that I can't mix that with alcohol, but did take the Lexapro.

I guess I'm just seeing if anyone has had experience with social anxiety and alcoholism. I have gone back to drinking heavy every night since trying to drink a couple times a week and that hasn't worked.

You're in the newcomers to recovery section. Are you planning to stop drinking? Everything you mentioned is a bad cocktail.

It's a very common occurrence for those with anxiety of all kinds to try ans self medicate with alcohol. Unfortunately, the drinking eventually makes red anxiety even worse.

I'm mins of surprised he gave you benzos too, were you forthright about your drinking history? Have you ever considered therapy? Most meds work a lot better in combination with therapy.

No i was not forthright about the drinking. I haven't been to a doctor since I was required to in the military when I was in my early twenties. I can't blame it on him since he gave me exactly what I wanted. He didn't give me an extreme dose or anything either.

As much of a drinker I am, I am very conscious about hitting rock bottom which I haven't and maybe in the long run that is a bad thing.

I will try therapy as well, just seeing if anyone had a similar experience that could give me some insight.

I was on Klonopin for 2 1/2 years and it helped me stay away from booze for about two weeks but I eventually fell back into it. And was drinking on top of the benzos which led to scary blackouts where I did insane **** I don't remember.

Remember, benzos affect the same receptors in the brain that alcohol does, GABA. So maybe it'll help you stop drinking but benzos can be just as addictive and habit-forming. You might just end up trading one addiction for the other.

Everybody's different though. I would just say tread lightly and don't fool yourself into staying sick.

Maybe some of your anxiety is coming from the alcoholism itself?

Either way, hope it works out for you.

I have dealt with s.anxiety on and off throughout my life. My current strategy is to be as much "myself" as possible and be as honest as possible.-you know, genuine. I find that fighting it just makes it (the anxiety)worse. Regular exercuse seems to have a positive effect...In times of trouble, I Remind myself that most folks aren't even that good on picking up on anxiety anyway. -too wrapped up in their own heads.

One thing I know for sure, alcohol was ABSOLUTELY DISASTER in what it did to my anxiety. Like gas on a fire.

My new found confidence in its absence is THE main reason I don't return. I just can't live in fear like I was anymore.

You'll find a way. Keep researching.

I will tread lightly, and i agree that the alcohol raises the anxiety. I notice that I usually go from a 9 of 10 to a 7 - 8 of 10 when not drinking (in relation to work days, not actually while inebriated).

Social anxiety was the main driving force for my drinking. the booze was a magical potion for me. I could talk to anybody and be charming and engaging. However, eventually I started drinking way too much in social situations and there is nothing charming about slurring your words and being obnoxious. the

I have social anxiety sometimes I'm currently going through a good phase and building on it little by little

Have you got a plan

For most of my life I thought I was extroverted. I was apparently social and a leader and outgoing and confident.

It turns out, I actually have a lot of social anxiety and self doubt and fear and uncertainty. I didn't realize it until I stopped drinking and drugging and got clear in the head and with my emotions.

It actually got worse..... sweating and trembling at times in social situations... needing to calm myself.... worrying about what to wear as I will sweat through my shirts....

Everyone still says how outgoing and social and confident and what a leader I am. Yet on some level I still don't believe it. Still feel a fraud.

I'm working at it. It isn't easy and it's frustrating and often my solution is just to avoid people or uncomfortable social situuations. I'm growing and getting there.... but it is slow going at times.

I'm glad to be doing it all in sobriety. I've avoided meds so far, though I consider it frequently.... maybe a period of well tendedone medication would give me the space to rewire my mind-body circuitry. But for now it isn't so terrible that I'm ready to introduce meds. My history with drugs and alcohol leaves me with concern about how meds may influence me.... what they may do to erode my sobriety..... and also I want to do all I can to address my issues with clarity and my whole focus. That's said, I am prepared to try medication if things get too challenging or if life just isn't manageable. So far, it's never got to that point.


Anyway.... I wish you well, I understend, you're not alone. Stay sober and keep working on YOU.

My story is all about social anxiety and alcoholism/addiction. Its not easy but the best improvement in it I've had in my life is when I've had a period of sober time where I was regularly challenging myself (to a healthy degree, not overboard) by being in various social situations. Practice can help a lot. Not having the brain constantly crosswired with booze/drugs can really help with the small talk too.

Xanax is similar to alcohol in what it does and its addiction potential. In my own experience trying to switch drugs to help limit things never worked for me and sometimes made things worse.

I took prozac for awhile too and did find that it helped a bit with social anxiety for me. I think some people have better and worse luck with using anti-depressants to help with it, but I hope it works for you if you decide to keep taking it!

Please don't drink on the meds sick. Apart from possibly being dangerous the meds aren't likely to work.

I've been anxious my whole life - it's one of the reasons I started drinking.

I never went for meds.

Like others have said, exercise helps, breathing exercise helps and time itelf helps.

I'm at the age now where I don't have to do many things I don't want to do - so I don't :)

D

I might go back to the Dr and be honest about your drinking, he or she might not have prescribed Xanax if they knew your history. I know it's a bad combination because I had a Dr prescribe it for me and of course I never told them I was an alcoholic. I abused both and eventually I wound up in a hospital after my wife took me to the ER.

Be careful and honest.

I agree with everything Dee said.

I have had anxiety since my teen years and depression as well. It wasn't until my mid-forties that I turned to alcohol in desperation. And, of course, that led to 3 years of spiralling out of control. Alcohol doesn't help anxiety. Like Dee, I have chosen to not ask the dr for medication. I've been close, but I know it would be the wrong thing for me. If it was a temporary situation, maybe, but ongoing is another situation.

You might check out a couple of great books which offer lots of help with anxiety without medication:

When Panic Attacks by David Burns, MD
From Panic to Power by Lucinda Bassett

I get a lot of outdoor exercise, keep my life as stress free as possible, and most importantly, I have learned to say 'No' and not feel bad about it.

Hey there,
I have had social anxiety my whole life and drinking because of it...along with being a introvert...

This book I read which I LOVED "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" - Susan Cain.
The strengths of introverts... people that work corporate jobs that thrive being introverts in a world where extroverts are the "ideal".. people through history that are well known and successful that are introverts etc.


Changed my life in some ways and oddly helped with my social anxiety and panic attacks which kinda stemmed from being shy and a introvert. It gave me some confidence and taught me to look at myself in a much less negative way for being how I am ( introverted, Shy,Social Anxiety) ..

Best of luck!

Wow FreeOwl, you hit the nail on the head for me. I thought I was an extrovert also while drinking, but I have since learned in sobriety that I am actually an introvert and I too am experiencing social anxiery. I must admit, it was a relief to see someone else post such a similar situation. However, I'll still take sobriety as an introvert over being an extroverted alcoholic any day of the week!

Social anxiety is the main driving force for my drinking too.

for sure!!

:)

Be careful with the Xanax. Mixing it with alcohol is dangerous.

I'm in the same boat as well with fighting a never ending battle with horrible social anxiety, depression, and panic issues. I have been on anti-depressants for years and while they help some, are not a cure all. I've never been on xanax, but I am on clonazapam which is similar, and this does work very well.

Social anxiety and anxiety in general along with depression, was one of my main excuses for staying intoxicated. Having a career where I took orders from 4 or 5 people and gave orders to 35 didn't help matters for an introverted person such as myself. I was always spinning out of control.
I was given valium from my doctor when I told him I wanted to stop drinking. Then I found I liked them more when I washed them down with vodka (NOT GOOD). After all that crashed and a round of rehab, they had me on Celexa then Prozac or vise versa. The stuff just made me feel off. I gave all that up and decided to just deal with being me. I really had never given myself the opportunity to know who that was before. Been trying to work on building my life and career around my strengths and accepting my weaknesses. This would not be possible in the altered state I spent most of my life in. I still have some anxiety but have learned that it is usually unfounded and I ride it out.
I'm not condemning meds for those that may need them. I was just taking them to avoid facing myself. Mixing them with booze is a recipe for disaster.

I also suffer from social anxiety and I did not even know it until I got sober. I was shocked to find out I had social anxiety haha.. I found out I was self-medicating with alcohol. Its hard and does not get better overnight, and I find that I avoid a lot of people, places and things because of fear... I am afraid of talking to new people, being in new environments, making eye contact.. Now that Im sober I find it much easier to just avoid certain situations.. However, we cannot grow and get better until we slowly step out of our comfort zone. Simply living sober one day at a time and facing life without mind altering substances are great learning experiences. It gets better.. My anxiety is still there, but much less compared to when I was drinking.

I recently had a neighbor who is an alcohol bang on my door because she was having extreme anxiety and needed a drink. Her son had her car and she begged me to drive her to the liquor store so she could get relief from her anxiety. She was a nervous wreck. She was sober for six months and was a completely relaxed person who was very pleasant. She has been back out for about six months and is a nervous wreck once again.

I experienced the same thing when I drank. I would get a buzz for a short time when I drank but as soon as the alcohol started to wear off I was a nervous wreck. The amount of anxiety was always way greater then the short good feeling when I drank. Now that i don't drink I am very relaxed as compared to before.

Benzos and booze are extremely dangerous. Anti-depressants never worked for me while I was still drinking.

I found the only answer for me was complete abstinence.

Please keep posting and let us know how your doing. :)

Well I am on day 3 of complete sobriety and feeling pretty good. I stopped taking the benzo's, they weren't doing anything for me but making me more tired. The anti-depressants also make me tired but I am feeling better already. I have no craving, I think mainly because of the drowsiness as well as a positive attitude.

AA and the 12 steps has really helped be learn to live with my (natural )introvert state and change my thinking so that extroverts, and the rest of the world , aren't so threatening to me. I only went there for help to stop drinking, but the journey really has helped on so many other unexpected ways.

Like many others, I vaguely remembered being introvert at school. But had been self medicating for so long that I'd forgotten or didn't realise that I was still that way.

I appreciate the kind words and advice. I believe that there are things outside of medication that can help greatly. There are various levels of social anxiety and mine has always been extreme. There is a lot of research showing that genetics has a large part to do with it.


Anyways, I'm on Day 4 of complete sobriety after taking two days of weening off alcohol and I feel good.

I wrote down the pro's and con's of alcohol while at work.

Pro: Feel good for a couple hours
Be social with others (still can do this without alcohol)

Cons: Expensive
- Probably spent $300 a month at liquor store + money out per month
-Worked less/less productive - meaning less pay/raisess

Eczema Breakouts/Red Skin

Heavy dandruff that showed up on clothes

Dressed sloppily

Not a good role model for my kid/spent less quality time

Cooked less often/less healhty

Liver/health problems/hard time breathing (I think I'm actually allergic)

Overweight

Anxiety/paranoia

Very helpul thread . I was a very shy boy and it stayed with me all my life .When I discovered alcohol I was amazed at how different I felt socially ,unfortunately I was an alcoholic many years before I even heard the term but did't know it . Had my first panic attack at 18 then discovered Ativan in the70s that's when the cycle of booze benzos took hold and went on like that for years . In by late 40s tried CBT therapy twice in 2 years I think it helped for a spell but soon forgot what I was taught ( my fault ,not blaming the therapy ) . In MY experience medication long term never worked including a host of SSRIs .
Hope you find some useful answers here I know I do however saying all that ive been back out rolling in the mud for 5-6 days and now into day 2 sober .
Good luck friend