Throwing away the empties
 

I had the pleasure of scouring my parents' basement for the empties I've hid there for the past 4 years. My father and I found 17 empty 22 oz bottles hidden in boxes of books and clothes. That's roughly 33 beers I stashed away because I was too ashamed to let my parents see the quantity I was consuming on my occasional weekend trips to my boyhood home.

Upon reflecting, I've come to realize that I got a thrill from hiding my addiction from others. I guess I felt a sense of empowerment, which is odd b/c I was a slave to my alcoholism for years. The more distance I get from a drink (I'm on day 41), the stranger my history of abuse becomes.

I used to put my wine bottles in paper bags so no one would see how many there were in the recycle bin. :(

:c011: Congratulations

Clearing all of the empties out of my house and the trashbags in the trunk of my car was a huge load off my chest before I went to rehab.

I did the same thing (and to prevent the huge bags of bottles from all clinking as I was taking them out), and I also hid bottles when I'd visit my parents.

I still find empty beer cans every once in a while in totally random places... Smh. I used to take my empty vodka bottles to public trash cans so my neighbors never knew how much I was drinking (we shared a recycle bin). I didn't think it was a big deal at the time, but now it seems ridiculous. SO happy I don't live like that anymore!!

I used to set my alarm clock for 3 in the morning so I could dispose of my empties in the neighborhood's church recycle bin... now looking back: that was absolutely insane.
Like you, I think I got a sick thrill from hiding my addiction like living a double life up to the point where it started like having a second full time job.
Good going with being honest with your dad and getting rid of the empties
:scoregood:

I spent a lot of time over the years disposing of empty bottles in creative ways. What a waste of time and energy that was.

I got so embarrassed by the rattling of the empties, I started to store mine in milk crates under the house - I got up to 40+ crates, and realised this was an untenable move.

D

I would always get shooter bottles. They were easy to conceal. Also i thought they help me moderate. Guess again. Policing them up was like a twisted easter egg hunt. Then the bag that i used would jingle around like a pair of morracas.

One or two at a time mixed with random trash into convenience store trash cans was my usual. I'd be nervous every time . . . which is silly, because it's a trash can for customers, which I was, I was really feeling guilty for having to hide it in the first place because I knew I was lying to myself and those around me.