Today is going to be a challenge
 

So it's Day 4.

Days 1-3 have not been too bad, despite thinking about booze constantly I haven't been tempted but that's simply as I've had three very early starts in the past 3 days and had no choice but to stay sober.

I had hoped today would be okay as the past few days were. But the psychological noise is there.

I finish work at 5 and all I have to do tomorrow is go to a short meeting at Uni at 4:40 and that's it.

Between leaving work and getting home I will pass four places I can buy booze and I honestly don't know how I'm going to manage to not.

I also can't drink Tuesday or Friday so my mind is going

"Go on- Sunday and Thursday you can drink! Twice in one week is better than your usual 4 or 5 times! Come on!"

Twice in a week is an improvement but it would of course only be this week because of circumstances. The drunk brain is trying to lure me and I honestly don't know if I can resist.

The only real hope is that work gets busy as ill be shattered and be more likely to go straight home but Christ this is difficult

I had to post because my brain is just trying too hard to tempt me

It may not be an easy trip home but you can definitely not go into any of those shops.

It was a genuine revelation to me to realise I had other choices besides drinking.

We're not leaves being carried along down the gutter - we can still make choices, and good ones to boot.

you came here for a reason and you already know how spurious that 'Twice in one week is better than your usual 4 or 5 times!' line of reasoning is.

if we could control our intake of alcohol there'd be no need for such futile bargaining....

Resist. This is much more than just the end of a long day. This could be the start of a brand new chapter, if you let it :)

The more you resist, the stronger your sober muscles get., and the more things can change - in your favour :)

Your real hope lies not in you being too tired but in you assuming the responsibility for your recovery - you don't have to drink if you don't want to.

you can do this :)

D

You can do this!!! Congratulations on day 04!!! The start of an awesome day!

Your mission today is to finish the day without drinking. If you choose to accept this mission you will take hold of day 05!!

Dee knows :)
My first few weeks I was very indulgent with treats after work: cola, cake, potato chips whatever filled that void for the evening. I shared here about how guilty it made me but everyone said "do what you gotta do in early sobriety."
My desire for these things waned naturally and I didn't gain any weight because after 6 weeks sober I regained interest in exercising regularly.
If junk food snacks don't do it for ya consider some other indulgence: baths, movies, sushi....
Keep the long view in mind, it will not always be this hard. And keep sharing here, these folks got me through that period.

Did you ever wonder how many places on your way home you can get tea or coffee and cakes or some fruit or other sweets?
Our obsession with drinking - alcohol - can be overpowering and it puts blinders on us to the many other options that are available.

Think about it. There are just as many if not more places to get a soft drink. But until we program ourselves to think differently, all we are going to see are the places that offer booze.

Maybe take a different route home. It will help you concentrate on the drive instead of mindlessly following the same path.

Hang in there and stay strong.

Yes, it is difficult, and the way to quiet the voice is just to get through it. Next time will be easier.

Good for you for getting to Day 4.

Day 4 is fantastic, keep pushing through!! You can do this!! :scoregood

Congrats on day 4

It's well past 5:00, your time; I hope you made it safely past those liquor shops.

The urges, cravings and mental obsessions truly do lessen with time; allow it happen, DramaStudent. It's going to be worth it.

Oh man, this is EXACTLY what my day is like, nothing to do today and tomorrow I don't have a class at uni until 6:30 pm.
I'm not sure what to do, but I need to start doing something today to stay busy

I didn't make it.

It's ok. How do you feel?

I'm sorry you didn't make it - but at least now you have the opportunity to take the advice offered here, learn from your mistakes, and make a better plan next time, yeah? :)

This is a great link for recovery plans, dealing with cravings and finding real world support:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

D

Angry with myself. Disappointed, Frustrated.

That's good. You can learn from that.

It's hard, but try to walk the line between beating yourself up and letting yourself off the hook. And then try again tomorrow. It was good that you posted, you're holding yourself accountable.

Yeah, it's great that you posted, both before and after. If it were me I might have just disappeared off the SR map.

I'd also like to add, for the future, that a thing that's worked for me a few times in terms of coming home from work and passing liquor stores is: Take an alternate route, even if it's out of the way, that deliberately takes you past a place where you need to run an errand that you'll enjoy running, such as shopping for something you need (or have been meaning to get but don't need) and also like, or dropping something by a friend's place, that kind of thing. A fun errand. That way you're route home has an alternate stop to make that isn't related to alcohol, so you'll focus on that instead, and have something rewarding to feed your brain. I know that sounds odd, but for me, knowing I had set aside the money and directions to go by the game store on the way home, for example, since I like games, gave me safe passage home. Another time I just dropped off dry cleaning but it was pleasurable because I'd been meaning to do it without doing it for so long. That's just me.

Awww! Try again tomorrow xoxo

Sorry you're feeling bad about yesterday. Try not to dwell on it - we're far more likely to listen to our AV when were're feeling badly about ourselves.

Have you considered going to a support group? AA has been a lifesaver to me. At the start of my sober journey it meant that I could catch a meeting when I knew I was likely to slip, or when there were expanses of time that I was yet to learn how to fill without drinking. There will be an abundance of meetings in Edinburgh to choose from.

So now I've woken up I am feeling stupid for having drank, but I know I cannot drink for the next three days so I will at least reach day 4 again. I also basically "came out" as having a drink problem to my friends and the support has been overwhelming. It has also lead to a discussion about my mental health.

I have depression, but after looking at issues and talking to people I think I may actually be bi-polar so the first step is to see a doctor about both that and getting back into the process of being put on antabuse.

Thanks for the support guys xx