My first real challenge begins in 30 minutes
 

Hi SR. I've been sober now for 53 days, but I have always had some sort of crutch or support for that whole time.

Most of the period I have been taking antabuse, which has ruled out the drinking quite quickly, and other times, I've had the company of people who don't drink.

Today at 1pm local time, I will be alone and I haven't been able to get antabuse for over a week. (I did manage to source some from another state, but it hasn't arrived yet).

At this time on previous Saturdays, I have started my binge. On more than one occasion.

I am writing here to stay focused and hopefully avoid drinking.

May go for a walk later, or cook something. But will be here and hope to post in a sober fashion.

If anyone in Australia is interested in getting medication across state borders (legally) I am the man to ask btw :)

just stay close to SR DD :)

D

Glad you posted DD & Glad you are here.

Thanks Dee and Mariah :) Am about to head to the shop. Will pass liquorland.

Definitely keep coming back here this arvo and tonight! That always helps me when there's no one else around to keep me in check(which I need in early days!) I don't know if going past liqorland is the best idea though, I don't think I could do that if I wasn't feeling 100%, but if you do have to just do NOT go in, even if you want to or think you'll just buy soda or something.
Cooking sounds like a nice distraction though. Do you have something to do tonight? To keep busy?

Gotta put down the crutches sooner or later. Bet those sober legs are stronger than you think. You got this.

Forewarned is forearmed DD. I found it easier to resist when I was prepared; you're prepared and I'm sure you'll resist.

Use all your tools.

Thanks guys :) Went to the shop and got some passata and purple garlic cos it's the best right?

So, picked the basil and oregano, washed it and also picked a few bay leaves.

2 onions, 5 cloves garlic, 2 tubs tomato paste, 1/2 cup tomato ketchup, 1 tin diced tomatoes, 1 jar passata, 500g mince handful fresh basil, handful fresh oregano... And.. 1/2 a bottle of red wine. (I don't like wine - but it tastes good in food).

Time for spaghetti!

:lala

Good stuff! Cook some good sauce and send some here.

88 hungry Avenue

About Antabuse, it's like a walking aid, maybe your sobriety legs are stronger than you think. Trust yourself, I know I do!

You're stronger than you think- congrats on 53 days. You can do this. If you are worried though maybe wine for cooking isn't a great idea? I know for me in a moment of weakness it's just too easy if it is there looking at me. Food tastes just as great without the booze in it :)

I know....diff'rent strokes...but I gotta put my vote in for wine free sauce too.

I don't miss it :)

D

Keep posting DD and you'll get through this. :)

Thanks again guys. 4.22pm and it's nearly over. Going to take a nap for the last hour or so. I didn't drink any of the wine so that's okay.

There is beer in the fridge as well but it's not mine so I don't drink it. It's been there the whole 53 days. :p.

I'll come back a bit later :)

No wine for me either. I'm 100% against any form of alcohol ever again.
I don't even wana see a bottle of anything.

You can do it! Can't use those crutches forever!

You have wine and beer in the house? Excuse my incredulity, but the very first thing I did on the morning of day one was ditch about two litres of wine and 8 cans of lager - straight down the sink!

Not criticising - just that having it around wouldn't work for my - at least during the first few days.

Glad you have made it through anyhow!

Hi Mentium. One thing I don't seem to have in common with a lot of people oin here is that I am a tight-arse. A bottle of spirits in Australia is typically $35+ with a 24 carton of beer starting from $40.

When I was drinking, I didn't ever throw any alcohol out. Because I am tight. I would just drink whatever I had before starting my quit period.

The wine and beer in the house don't belong to me, so if I took it I'd be stealing. The house isn't mine either, so I can't tell the other people what they can and can't do.

I don't know why I'm not triggered by the stuff in the house. Just glad I'm not. :theyareon

You can do this DrunkenDonuts!! Keep pushing through with your 53 Days!! :)

just because I was in someone's house and it wasn't mine, didn't stop me when I was drinking.

I like the crutches reference too.

But I seemed to think from your original post that you were actually planning to drink - unknowingly in your head.
It's kinda like, 'I know it's going to hurt when you pull off this band-aid' versus, 'It will feel good to finally have this band-aid removed'.

I agree with D

First what is purple garlic.? Second no pasta sauce needs wine in it ever in my opinion. Third I understand not tossing all the booze my wife still has a wine rack full and she would be pissed if I touched it.

I understand why you guys would say to stay away from any alcohol at all and I can't argue. I do enjoy cooking though and a lot of yummy things are flavored with alcohol.

Does it mean I'm drinking if I eat something with alcohol in it?

The voice I used to get was "you're a alone! You can drink and no one will criticize you!" And so I drank. And then I'd drink alone in my room and watch internet videos and be to scared to come out and face people.

I don't want to do that any more. It's in my head now. Drinking screws me up. I don't like it. Others don't like it. I hate it.

If I ask for the beer to be removed that probably isn't a problem, but there is a wine collection in the house which wouldn't be removed so it seems a moot point. I have to learn to live with alcohol around me. It's a pervasive thing.

I hope I'm not coming across as making an excuse because I feel I haven't done anything wrong.I didn't even think to drink any wine when I was cooking. It was an ingredient.

If I were that bad I would have to throw out my soy sauce and mouth wash. And hand sanitizer. All contain alcohol.

I dunno Drunkendonuts. While you could get really sick on if you drank while on the antabuse, guess what? If you drink today, you will also feel sick since you're tolerance is not going to be what it used to be. You always had the decision to drink on it or not. Keep on remembering you can do it and stay sober!

Purple garlic is just garlic which has purple skin. It's locally grown here and seems extra garlicky.

I know you can make pasta sauce without wine and I've done so before. I guess it was in the fridge and I just wanted to use it.

Was a brilliant sauce BTW :)

DD, I have been reading your posts for awhile. You can do it. If you are really committed to sobriety, you can tough it out. Trust yourself, be an adult. Be responsible. You can do it. Seriously, you can do it. Don't obsess over alcohol. Its not worth it.

Well that purple garlic sounds excellent I doubt I can get it in NY but maybe.. I get what you mean about alcohol is everywhere, my wife has a full wine rack and I don't touch it. I am pretty sure she would get rid of it if I was stealing from it though.

Go dig me up some opals and box them up for me. That will keep you busy lol.

Looked into it a bit more... The purple garlic is hard stemmed and they grow it in Texas as well. Hope you can get some. It's awesome.

Instead of opals you might want to Google oil and coober pedy. Invest wisely :)

Interesting, but i'll take the opals please. LOL. Just a hobby of mine. Not sure how the oil find will play out. First off shale oil is way overrated. Right now extraction costs are going thru the roof. Not only that, the world is awash in oil. So much so, they are literally running out of places to put it yet no one is cutting production. I'm no expert, but I know more about it than the avg. joe as I do own some oil leases.