Did I ever tell you all how much I appreciate all of you?

Jennifer

It sounds like they are all spiritually asleep rather than awake.

Look for another group.

Primary Purpose Group in Dallas, Texas will "online " sponsor you through the steps.

Being "on" step one for months is just BS.

I got similar treatment from some jackass years ago, turned out he'd never done the steps.

Just "held" me on step one for a year and hoped I'd go off and drink.

Which i eventually did under the lash of dry drunkenness.

Hi Jennifer, good to meet you. I just replied but there's something wrong with the board or my connection and it flew off to cyberspace when trying to send. I'm just going to condense what I said.

Its not just time to move on from her but from that home group IMHO... something way wrong there. As for Steps and sponsors, I did my first three steps in one day... the first day I attended a meeting and I did them seated at the table with just 5 other people there. All it took was seeing myself with brutal honesty, willingness and being ready to reach out to God in my desperation. That's it. No one could do that for me including a sponsor. By the time I wanted to do the 4th Step, I figured it was a good idea to get a sponsor because I needed someone to hear my 5th Step too and wanted the same person for each. But, very frankly, my goal was sobriety and changing my life and had I not been able to find a suitable sponsor, I would have gotten on with it anyway.

It sounds to me like you already have all that's required to get to at least the 3rd Step so I say go for it sponsor or no sponsor.

Glad you're here and have made a decision to quit drinking!! That is indeed a huge step, and the most important one by far ..... the others will come :)

Trying some other groups is a good idea, perhaps - if it's an option.
One group I attend has a temporary sponsor format for newcomers. Just to get them on the right track.

If your comfortable with it, perhaps consider sharing in a meeting that you need a sponsor or even a temporary one.

Wishing you the best Jen - Proud of you for your efforts!! That - a - gal!!!

FlyN

Hey Jen. I'm happy to see what you had to say in your others posts on this thread.

Just wanted to let you know know I'm happy to chat anytime. Just send me a PM. :)
Love and light.

Ditto to what Paper Dolls said. I forget that others probably don't have several hundred meetings in their county. Hit me up if you need to talk! :)

So my selfish day turned into a quest from my higher power. As I was complaining to you all about MY problem with AA I received a call from a friend in the programs husband. She went on a bender. I called my sponsor, she answered and we made a plan. I called another lady. I will call her my second sponsor and the one I would like to work steps 4 and up with. We went to my friends, not quite knowing what to expect. She seemed to feel better after a loooong talk with both me and my sponsor. And grateful. I hope she dusts herself off and continues her journey.
That, my friends, is the first time in my life I was not driven by me, selfish needs or personal gratification. I could have come up with 100 different reasons not to go to her house. I am sorry. My temp sponsor, and my new one, and AA are a godsend.,just because they operate differently than I do doesn't make them awful. Creator gave me the grand AA tour today. And I am grateful to be of service to my fellow alcoholic. I am so full of love and gratitude right now, it's indescribable. It is so far from the old me.

Jennifer

Fantastic Jennifer :)

D

Your story sounds familiar to me. Looking back at my original short-list of potential sponsors, man am I glad I never had the courage to ask any of them. The guys I thought had their stuff together sure as heck don't. I can see that now that I have some time. I couldn't see it then. I suspect most others with less than a year or so don't really know what to look for anymore than I did.

You did learn a super important lesson WAY before I did though.....the one where you figure out what non-selfish / nothing-in-it-for-me actions can to do and for you. I didn't really give much of a damn for anyone in AA for a year or two. No surprise, those were some pretty dark years for me. Amazing that I didn't drink again. Lucky I suppose.

It sounds like you have the sponsor thing solved.....or at least partly solved. If you don't or you want some additional advice, please feel free to PM me.

Ty Dee and day trader.

I never thought I had it in me to care about anyone but me, and my immediate family. This was indeed in someone else's hands.

Jennifer

Step 12.

The only step that got its own entire chapter. :)

Good work!!!

Kind of amazing how things work out in the right way at the right time.

A simpler more likely explanation might be that the people you asked to sponsor you haven't worked the steps themselves and are afraid to admit it. I am also from a small town and at any given meeting there might be 2-3 people who have actually worked the steps or have sponsors themselves. It is nothing to do with you.