At the end of the day. It comes down to a personal choice. I also do hate the feeling that I cannot do certain things in order to protect my sobriety. The fleeting thought of 'hmm, is this a bad idea?' passed within a few seconds. I never contemplated ordering a drink. I felt great about it afterwards. I think it would have been a downer to wait 45 minutes to get a table only to be depressed about having to do that.

The risk and the downside are obviously great. If I'm wrong, it could be bad. But, I think, inside, each of us knows what we can and cannot handle. The real tests are the ones that cannot be controlled - loss of a loved one, loss of employment and other emotional events that makes you want to revert to the old coping mechanism.

That's kinda my opinion. I won't go out seeking to test my limits, but I certainly will be attending holiday celebration with my friends even though there's always been lots of drinking. Only time will tell for sure, but I don't think it will be a problem for me.

pakman

I am of two minds on this..
I myself just put myself through an "unsuggested" experience.
And I am stronger and wiser for it.

But...putting myself through tests with booze at an arm's reach (or a bartender in my face..away) hmmm...don't know. I have gone to pub's to eat and have had no issue. But a few weeks back I put myself through a looooooong social experience at a pub that tested my mettle...for sure.

I came close to getting up and leaving as at one point as my anxiety was overwhelming. So I guess..as long as you know to "get the hell out of dodge" before picking up...and maybe that's a crap shoot sometimes.

Not sure. I do know that when I DO get through to the other side...ya, I give myself a big ole pat on the back and my sobriety feels stronger for it.

To each his own I guess. In the end...you're the captain of your sobriety ain't ya?

"relapse is a process not a single isolated event"

Wise words.

I am so newly sober that I don't know how I would feel sitting at a bar. Maybe later, with more time under my belt. I don't want to risk it and for now, I'm not missing it. As GracieLou said, there is a big difference between going to a restaurant to eat and going to a bar to get drunk .I'm not interested in going out to get drunk or hanging out with drunks any more, so why go there .


Ultimately, yes, I want to be able to go anywhere I choose and not be bothered by people with drinks, and I think Heartcore and Fantail have a wonderful outlook. Don't want to hide away in fear for ever.

But not now, not while things are still a bit raw. Perhaps such a confident outlook will with time, I hope so anyway.

I know that it had been me, it would be my AV persuading me that it was ok to sit at the bar. Next time, it might persuade me to sit at the same bar and order a drink.

Whenever I got sober before I was always keen to road test my sobriety. I lived the same life I did before and naturally I found myself in many situations when I would usually drink.

My downfall was assuming that because I got through a situation once that granted me eternal immunity.

It doesn't.

My old life was all about drinking. The last time I got sober I realised I needed a new life :)

D

I think it all depends. Last time I quit was for 92 days. I would go to a local bar that had the NFL package and sit there all day drinking water and iced tea. I was never tempted. Then one day I wound up at my buddies 1 year old daughters birthday. I poured myself a cup of "princess juice"........mind you at a 1 y Olds bday party. Turns out it was for the adults. Sheesh!
I think it's best to always be on top of your game. And if that means staying away from temptation, then it's what's best for you.

Not a good idea to test youself in early sobriety,which I would say is at least as long as a year.

The chances are you will end up drinking if you keep doing this.

I'm early in recovery, at least I think so, and I go to all the same places and do all the same things. No problem. I don't drink anymore, so it's not an issue. This is a very personal thing, though, so you are the only one who can really answer this question.

I ALWAYS have a plan, and I never for one second take for granted that I am sober. Even though I know I will never drink again.

The only environment that has ever chosen to take a drink for me lives in between my ears. But that's MY take. In the end, it's all up to you. Opinions vary.